


Thinking of You

by withyouandthemoon



Category: The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Werewolf, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-28
Updated: 2017-08-30
Packaged: 2018-12-20 23:16:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 29,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11931402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/withyouandthemoon/pseuds/withyouandthemoon
Summary: The time they spent apart was almost as long as they were together, and Caroline was ready to go home.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Writerwithagoal](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Writerwithagoal/gifts).



> I was prompted to write something with the song Thinking of You by Christian Kane as an inspiration. It's a great song and it gave me a lot of ideas, but as I'm a terrible planner I put too many scenes into my outline and the drabble turned out to be...this. Anyway, hope you like it!

_Sedona, 2016_

Klaus parks his car just to the side of the little diner. He doesn’t have much time anyway-he can already feel the agitation building in his muscles, a hot and sour buzz sneaking in between the seams of his bones. The dry air of Arizona seems more humid than usual, almost like home, a sense of excitement and dread brewing, sending incessant charges through his exposed skin.

An impending full moon does that to you. Especially when you are a wolf.

With long strides Klaus enters the diner, a bell ringing coarsely on the wooden door in his wake. The smell of fat and cheap sauce mixed with old plastic immediately assaults his extra sensitive senses. Forgoing the greasy booths that look like they’ve seen too much human body fluid, he settles at the bar.

“Burger and fries with coke.” He signals at some man behind the counter, not bothering to raise his head from his phone. According to the message he just received his pack is already inside one of the wilderness areas deep into the Coconino Forest. A somewhat routine for them on these cursed days, no matter what area they temporarily reside in-the pack has grown into one of the largest ones in Northern America during the past five years of constant migration, and they can’t risk running into stray tourists in their lethal forms.

“You’re new.”

Sensing someone approaching Klaus instantly puts away his phone, meeting the curious gaze. The man standing in front of him across the counter is well-built, eyes sharp despite the playfulness of his tone.

“And an Aussie.” The man slightly furrows his brows, but smiles nonetheless, grabbing the towel on his shoulder and starting to wipe the counter, seemingly in for a long conversation.

“And in a hurry.” Klaus is in no mood to justify the origin of his accent.

The man laughs mid-wipe, winking at Klaus, “someone’s cranky. It’s that time of the month, huh?” he ignores Klaus’ menacing glare and continues, “don’t worry, I’ve already put your order in. Wouldn’t want you wandering around Sedona on a full moon.”

“And what about you, mate?” Klaus lifts one brow, a crooked smile donned on the corner of his lips, “not afraid of fairy godmother’s magic running out at midnight?” He can recognize the smell from a mile away. Wolves can’t hide from each other even if their lives depend on it.

The guy grimaces, “I’m gonna be the bigger person and assume that you were comparing me to the pumpkin.” He then offers a good-natured smile, “my family has lived here for several generations. Let’s just say we have our own _shelter_ ,” he rolls his eyes on the word, “for the monthly ordeal. Oh, I’m Mason by the way.”

Klaus examines Mason’s face for a second before shaking the offered hand briefly, “Klaus.”

“So Klaus, what brings you to the fine town of Sedona?” Mason resumes his work at the counter.

“Just…running some errands.” He actually came to visit a small art gallery by the Oak Creek River this morning but Klaus isn’t about to divulge. Art has always been fairly personal to him and he rarely shares these ventures with anyone, except _her_. The thought brings a dull ache all too familiar to his heart, and Klaus silently bites his teeth to maintain a stoic expression.

“A man of few words, I see.” Mason snorts, “probably a wolf thing.” Just then a pick-up call sounds from the kitchen. Mason retrieves Klaus’ meal, setting it in front of him before asking, “where are you going later? You know, when the moon comes up?”

“Into the forest. My pack is waiting for me.” Klaus bites into his burger. It actually tastes okay, the bread soft and meat juicy, with a generous layer of pickles-just the way _she_ likes it. The burger turns to saw dust in his mouth the instant that notion creeps into his mind, making it hard to swallow all of a sudden.

“Wait, so you’re the alpha of that new pack in town?” Mason exclaims in a hush, “wow. Your pack’s huge! I heard that you guys came from the north. Although I’ve got to say, nice choice. It’s much warmer and way pleasant down here.”

Klaus finishes the burger in a few bites while Mason gushes over-excitedly. He’s lost his appetite, but he needs the strength for the turn tonight. “We’re actually from Mystic Falls originally, ” he can’t help the wistful smile, though he clears his throat to hide it upon noticing Mason’s surprised look, “it’s a small town in Virginia. But we are constantly on the move. It’s not safe for a pack this big to stay in one place for too long. ”

He stays silent for a split second before correcting in a steely voice, but his eyes are warm with a faraway look, like the reflection of the rosy rocks in the outskirts of Sedona bathed in sunset, “and I’m not the alpha.”

His alpha has always been the one and only from the very start.

* * *

_Mystic Falls, 2005_

Klaus sidestepped yet another crunchy fallen leaf, careful not to make a sound. Years of being an outcast of every pack he had ever been dropped into had taught him many things, the ability of making himself scarce being one of them, and sensing others’ hidden hostility another.

He knew when he wasn’t welcome. And he wasn’t about to expose himself as an easy target.

He remembered Ayanna’s words before leaving, “try to fit in. It wouldn’t be the worst thing.” And he merely shrugged at that, ignoring her aged eyes with a hint of sadness in them. Easy for her to say, when she’s not the one being cast among packs and guardians like some smelly rotten meat. Even she herself didn’t want anything to do with him.

Yet to be fair, he wasn’t supposed to be Ayanna’s responsibility to begin with. She was, after all, just his mother’s friend from a long time ago. And his mother had been dead upon his birth bed. Right here in this dreary little town, no farther than three miles from where he stood.

He had thought that he would feel something, here being his birth place and all. Some sense of familiarity or belonging, that tiny little click in your heart signaling the closure of a long existing rift, even if just a part of it. But he felt nothing, except the unpleasant humidity and heat that he’d heard about. After sixteen years he finally returned to the land that he hadn’t once stepped his foot on, and yet he just felt…sweaty. Nothing had changed really.

And Klaus suspected that it never would.

But one thing did change. He was officially addressed as _Klaus_ now. Thanks to his new alpha. The thought brought an imperceptible smile to his face.

He had heard of the young alpha from Ayanna before they arrived. Her parents died in a battle against vampires when she was only seven, and the little girl, being their only heir, had been groomed to become the alpha with the help of the elders in the pack for the past six years. Expecting some cold and overbearing brat, Klaus was taken aback at the meeting last week where he was introduced to her and the pack for the first time.

“Your name’s Niklaus? That’s kind of strange.” The girl’s blond curls bounced on her shoulders at the involuntary tilt of her head, her blue eyes brimming with curiosity. Perhaps noticing the surprised look on Klaus’ face, she quickly caught herself, an adorable shade of pink creeping up her cheeks, “sorry…that was rude of me. It’s just a little uncommon.”

Klaus smiled a little. He’d seen his fair share of alphas, but never one had the propensity (or the gut) to apologize this easily, if at all. He bowed his head slightly without breaking eye contact, “it was the name my father gave me. I do not particularly care for it myself.”

The girl seemed thoughtful for a moment, biting her lips while observing him quietly. Klaus could recognize kind eyes when he spotted a pair, but her eyes were also penetrating despite their obvious innocence. After a few seconds she said a little shyly, but with determination in her voice, “what would you like to be called then?”

He paused a beat, and then responded equally resolute, “Klaus.”

She nodded solemnly, her eyes sweeping through the pack members around them before landing back on him, her face instantly morphing from that of a young girl’s to an unquestionable leader’s, all shyness replaced by confident authority, “welcome to the pack, Klaus.”

Klaus held her eyes for a second longer, mesmerized by her power or trying to see through her mask he couldn’t even tell himself. “I haven’t had the honor to know the name of my alpha.” His tone was intended to be teasing, but came out sincere beyond his comprehension.

And the amazingly bright smile was back on her face, “I’m Caroline.”

Klaus hadn’t seen a smile like that for the past week from any other. Though he was welcomed into the pack by Caroline, it seemed that some of the pack members did not share their alpha’s mind. And the crack of a branch he was hearing right that second was enough testament.

“Why so furtive when you’ve clearly outnumbered me?” He was good at avoiding conflict, yes, but not so cowardly as to back out of an inevitable fight.

Three men sauntered out from the thick bush beside him. Klaus recognized the faces which had shown nothing but contempt and resentment from a far corner where other pack members had approached him with cautious hospitality, or at least indifference. They were all lesser in built, clearly not the main fighters of the pack, with flickery eyes of greed more akin to hyenas than wolves.

“Look who’s all smug with his limey accent and fancy words.” One of the three stepped up, thumbs tucked in the back pockets of his baggy jeans, seemingly the leader of their pathetic little group. Klaus vaguely remembered seeing him talking to Caroline in a similar posture, and the young alpha had kicked his sorry ass in no more than a full sentence. Klaus had to hand it to the girl-not wasting your time on losers is such a rare virtue these days.

“John, is it?” He lifted an eyebrow, folding both hands behind his back, “I see you’ve been loafing around, yet another day. Quite a commendable life style really.”

John snorted, glaring at him, “shut it, smart ass. You should respect your elders. Especially when you are living off of our pack like a little leech.” He took another menacing step towards Klaus, sizing him up with a lopsided grin, “why did you get thrown out of your last one anyway? They’ve finally realized what a useless trash you are?” The other two men with him snickered at that in support.

“If incompetence alone justifies an exile you’d be long gone from this pack.” Klaus opened his arms in a mocking gesture, “sadly that’s not the case. So here you are, still _leeching_ , to quote your colorful vocabulary.”

John narrowed his eyes, “you are a mouthy one, aren’t you?” His face contorted into a taunting smirk, “shouldn’t have been a surprise. With your slut of a mother, opening her legs for one of ours behind her husband’s back. I bet she’s a loud one, just like you. How else would she land a wolf? Humans ain’t got the moves, must be the-”

He was cut short by a fist right in his jaw from a lunging Klaus. He stumbled back, startled, and Klaus was already on him, hands clutching his throat in a vice grip. John opened his mouth in sheer horror, but the only sounds coming out were shattered whimpers.

At that moment the other two men finally came to their senses and rushed to his rescue, one pinning Klaus in a headlock while the other tried to pry his hands away. Klaus growled, violently shrugging the one behind him away, using the momentum to bang John’s head heavily into the ground. John let out another pained groan, legs kicking like crazy, his face turning almost purple from the lack of oxygen. The man beside him landed a hard punch in Klaus’ stomach. Klaus winced, his grip loosening, but for some reason the man who just punched him was now holding him firmly in place.

“Put that stone down, Logan.” A beautiful female voice interrupted the chaos. Everything went still around him, including the grip on his shoulders, John’s malicious grin that appeared on his face seconds ago, and the hot and labored breath that he could suddenly feel behind him.

“I will not repeat myself, Logan.” The voice spoke again, lower this time, each word cold and clear like light reflecting from the edge of a sword, but Klaus could almost detect the underlying urgency. “Do as I say.”

Klaus heard a dull sound of something dropping to the ground not far from him, and then the breath behind him was gone. He dug his fingers into John’s neck one more time, making him shout out in pain before releasing him, standing up and turning to face his alpha.

Caroline’s lips were pressed into a thin line, arms crossed in front of her chest, a few stray curls from her ponytail falling into her face only to be pushed away by her angered breath. She eyed Klaus inconspicuously from head to toe as if checking for injuries before setting her gaze on the other three, stopping them dead in their track to approach.

“That little son of a bitch!” John cried out dramatically, “he nearly choked me to death!”

“I have three things to tell you, John.” Caroline smirked, holding out a hand and beginning to count down her fingers, “one, I am neither blind nor an idiot. I know what I saw. I don’t need you to describe it for me, thank you very much. Two, language. Hello? Minors here! Watch your tongue.” She rolled her eyes, “and three, congratulations on being beaten up by a sixteen-year-old, after you _ambushed_ him with your _buddies_.”

Klaus idly turned around with a smirk of his own. He couldn’t resist seeing John’s face at this very moment, and he wasn’t disappointed. John’s eyes were round with shock and fury, veins popping out in the corner of his forehead. He opened his mouth to speak, but Caroline beat him to it with an upholding index finger, “and no, before you protest, please refer to the first thing I told you. I so not want to repeat myself. It’s inefficient and boring.”

Klaus strained himself so much to hold back a laugh his stomach hurt where he was just punched. A pretty face, a sharp tongue and an attitude. The young alpha sure was full of surprises.

But John apparently wasn’t amused. He shot Klaus a dirty look and all but spat out, “Caroline, you don’t know what you are doing with this one here. He’s bad news to all of us. His mother had an affair with some loser from our pack and got herself knocked up. She died from giving birth to this demon spawn,” he accusingly pointed a finger at Klaus, “but not before spilling the beans to her husband. Dude went crazy-not that I could blame him. Took a gun and went after our whole pack.”

Klaus’ blood boiled from John’s words, but he just felt cold all over. He glared unseeingly at John, shoulder square and spine straight, as if bracing himself for an impending storm.

“His real dad was shot, his fake dad killed himself after, innocent pack members lost their lives in the middle of it. He’s brought nothing but filth, blood and death to this world ever since he was born.” John snorted disparagingly, “why do you think he spent all those years in Europe and not one of the packs kept him? Why do you think your own father turned him away?”

Klaus had heard enough. He bit his teeth, ready to throw himself at John again, consequences be damned. But a small hand closed around his wrist, delicate fingers trembling slightly yet firm like the voice of their owner, “those other packs turned him away because people like you, unfortunately, are everywhere. And my father…had his reasons. But I’m not my father. And I’ve already welcomed Klaus into our pack so I suggest you defer to your alpha and cut the crap.”

John squinted dangerously, “you may be the alpha, Caroline, but I’m older than you.” He took a step forward, and the other two followed suit, “As an adult here it is my duty to keep dirty little bastards from clouding your judgment.”

Klaus was still half froze from Caroline’s touch. All he could feel was the warm skin around his like a soothing little whisper that he didn’t register John’s cutting words or their threatening manners. Before he knew it the three of them came at him in a rush. He was expecting painful strikes when a hand shoved him back roughly, but without extra force. He looked up shocked to see Caroline holding John back with her two hands against his chest, and the other two with merely her fiery eyes, blocking him from their onslaught.

“You will not insult him in my face.” She raised her head to look John in the eyes, her voice strained due to the effort of fending him off, “you will show respect to him. You will not bring up his past again, which has nothing to do with himself, or you for that matter, and is nothing compared to the disgusting deeds you’ve committed.”

John huffed in barely-masked contempt, towering over her, “and why would I do that to a _worthless_ _bastard_?” he bit the last two words out while sending a side glare at Klaus.

“Because he’s my _beta_.” Caroline responded without missing a beat, “because I now name Klaus the beta of this pack.”

“You what?” John exclaimed disbelievingly, stepping back in shock. With his sudden retreat Caroline lost balance and fell to the ground. John laughed hysterically, “oh little Caroline, no need to apologize this hard for your moment of insanity. He’s got a pretty face, I’ll give you that.”

Caroline jumped to her feet with a growl, her hands balled into fists, catapulting towards John like a booming firework. John raised his hands in defense, immersed too deep into the fighting scene to care about her status in the pack. But in an instant Klaus was before her, blocking Caroline from the three’s harm for a change.

“Don’t you dare lay a finger on my _alpha_.” The phrase flowed out of his mouth so naturally, as if it had been sealed inside him long ago and was now freed from its dormant state, along with it liberating hidden strength and conviction. And then he felt it, the little click deep in his heart, the tiny yet unmistakable signal that the black-hole-like rift was beginning to close as a whole.

John’s brazen voice caught his attention, “getting into your new role pretty quick, huh? You two really are a pair.” He narrowed his eyes, “but what would the pack think? Little Caroline here has just crowned her latest crush the beta. What would the others say when they know about this?”

“Bravo, perhaps.” Another female voice sounded from behind the bushes, “from your bruises I’ll assume he’s a decent fighter, and has good judgment of character.”

Klaus turned around to see a young woman standing a few feet away with hands on her hips. If he recalled correctly her name was Jenna. She had approached him shortly after the introduction meeting and shown him around.

Before John could answer another voice cut in, “I’m not opposed to the idea. He’s loyal enough from the looks of it.” A middle-aged man Klaus didn’t know the name of appeared beside Jenna. Then yet another voice from the other side of them, “I trust Caroline. If she’s decided then I’m all for it.” This one Klaus knew. It was one of Caroline’s close friends. Bonnie, was it?

Then more voices came from all directions around them. “Me too.” “Count me in.” “And me.” apparently their little commotion had drawn the whole pack here and Klaus was surprised beyond words that so many people, the majority of whom he didn’t even knew, were defending the new beta of the pack, namely _him_ , with similar determination. He looked back at Caroline, for the first time in so long showing a dumbfounded expression, but Caroline just smiled at him and reached out to squeeze his hand.

“John, you’ve heard the pack.” One of the elders, Sheila, stepped out of the crowd circling them, “now stand down and show some respect to your alpha and beta, or face an exile.”

John stared at Sheila, then Caroline, then Klaus for a few moments, his gaze less and less hostile with each passing second and the silent pressure from the whole pack. Finally he stepped back and bowed his head down a little, the other two immediately following his lead. In the loud cheer of the crowd Klaus met Sheila’s eyes, deep and knowing like they held all the answers in the world. “Don’t let us down.” He heard her saying, “don’t let _her_ down.” And that’s when he realized Caroline was still holding his hand.

Later when the crowd dispersed, he turned to look at Caroline in their silent trek into the woods, now composed enough to ask, “why me?”

He didn’t let the full sentence out but Caroline seemed to understand him just fine. She tilted her head slightly, the afternoon sunlight outlining her soft profile like golden frosting, sweet and satiny, “why not you?”

“It’s not exactly nice to answer a question with another one, is it?” Klaus wiggled his brows.

She huffed a laugh, poking him in the ribs, “I just saved your ass back there so I think I’m nice enough.”

Klaus stared at her wide-eyed, but she just stared back with large blue eyes, not budging an inch. “Fine,” he faked an exasperated sigh, “I’m new here, I’m not old enough, and I don’t have a shiny track record.” His voice lowered, “I wouldn’t deem someone like myself worthy of being a beta.” The moment those words left his mouth he regretted them, so he looked aside to avoid Caroline’s eyes.

But she didn’t seem to notice his discomfort, “why did you ask my name that day?”

He snorted, “sweetheart, you’ve asked me two questions now and yet to answer mine. That’s hardly fair.”

She wrinkled her nose, blushing uncontrollably, “sweetheart? What’s that, some British pick-up expression?”

“Now that’s the third, _sweetheart_.” He retorted playfully.

She rolled her eyes, “you and me both know life isn’t fair, Klaus. Suck it up.” She crossed her arms in front her chest stubbornly, “I’m not telling you until you answer all my questions.”

He opened his arms, palms up in defeat, “well, it just seemed right, you know? I give you my name, you give me yours. General courtesy.” He intended to stop there, but her clear eyes were like some elixir of verity to him, and he couldn’t help but divulge, “and I was curious. About you. If we weren’t in front of all those people I would’ve asked you a lot more than your name.”

“What do you want to know?” She asked quietly.

He took in a deep breath, “Your hopes. Your dreams. Everything you want in life.”

Caroline laughed at that, her long eyelashes trembling like a hummed tune, and Klaus found himself longing to discover what was behind. But then she spoke, this time more serious, “of all the people I formally met, you were the first to ask about my name. Others either knew about me already, or they didn’t care. I was the alpha. That was all they needed to know.”

For a moment her eyes were filled with too much wistfulness to be that of a teenage girl’s. But Caroline quickly blinked and faced him with a bright smile, “but you made me feel like _Caroline_. And that’s so wonderful.”

“And the way you told me your name?” She continued, “you seemed so sure. Like, you know about who you are and what you want and all the things that you said you wanted to ask me. And I want to know those things too.” Her face was flushed and glowing as if the sheer prospect of discovering the truth lighted her up from the inside.

Klaus felt he was going blind. It was like looking directly into the sun, and the light was so strong that it burned a sizzling mark on your retina and you just felt warm and satiated. Only this wasn’t on his eyes. It was in his dark, cold heart. He almost didn’t trust his own voice, “you are smart, sweetheart. You’ll figure it out.” He smiled at her gently, “all in good time.”

He reached out to her face inadvertently, only to catch himself at the last minute, changing directions to the crown of her head instead, “hold still, there’s something in your hair.” He removed the long feather tangled in her blond curls, “it must have gotten there when you fell.”

Caroline snatched the feather from his hand in horror, wielding it midair frantically, “what? You mean I’ve had this in my hair all this time? I had a bird feather, in my hair, while everyone watched, and you didn’t tell me until now? Oh my god this is a disaster!”

“I seemed to recall we were facing more pressing matters at the time.” Klaus pressed his lips hard to hold in the laughter.

“Stop laughing! It’s not funny!” Caroline stomped her feet, now very teenager-like.

Klaus grinned while retrieving the feather from her hand, “easy there, love.” He smoothed the poor thing between two fingers, “it’s a blue jay’s tail feather.” He showed it to Caroline in his palm, “beautiful, isn’t it?”

“Yeah it is.” Caroline calmed down at his words, touching the feather again in a delicate gesture, and the instant her fingertip made contact with his skin through the thin layer of fluff Klaus felt a jolt of electricity flowing through his body.

Words jumbled on his tongue but nothing coherent would come out. In the end he just carefully stuck the feather back into her hair, this time just to the side of the top of her ponytail like a little embellishment, “blue suits you Caroline. It brings out your eyes.”

And she let him.

 


	2. Chapter 2

_Sedona, 2016_

Caroline sits at the bar in the small diner, examining her perfectly manicured nails. She’s a little sad she’ll have to say good-bye to them soon. No matter how careful and experienced you are, your nails are bound to chip a little while shifting. One of the worse aspects of being a wolf. But no need sitting here pouting. She raises her head yet again and waves at the waiter who finally notices her. Thank god the morning rush has died down.

She smiles at the waiter who’s now standing next to her, waiting until his pencil is readily poised above his pad and begins to order, “good morning. I’d like a burger, extra pickles with fries.”

The waiter lifts one eyebrow, not hiding his surprise, “burger for breakfast?”

Caroline shrugs, “it’s practically time for brunch anyway. And I need the extra calories for later.” She tilts her head to the side, eyeing the waiter with a smirk, “you’re a wolf, right? You know how it is.” Not waiting for a response she blurts out wide-eyed, “oh, and a large coke. Not the diet ones. I want real sugar in it.” She taps her index finger on the counter to emphasize the point.

The waiter laughs while jotting it down, “you are an upfront one. And really…lively. I’ll blame it on the moon.” He winks before extending a hand, “I’m Mason.”

“Caroline.” She returns the favor, “and the _liveliness_ is all me.”

She watches him retreating to the kitchen to put in the order, her mind already miles and years away from the here and now. She can’t help but think back to all the times when someone said that she had so much _life_ in her.

It’s ridiculous really. One moment she’s living her life, going through the motions like every normal people around her, and the next she’s sucked into this alternative universe or something where there’s only the two of them. Sometimes she feels like even time doesn’t exist in that platform. They’re stilled into eternity like one of his paintings, but no fire or water of this world can ever ruin what is there.

The sentiment-now _that_ she blames on the moon.

“So…a lone wolf, huh?” A voice sounds from across the counter, “what brings you to our town?”

Caroline looks up to see Mason back with her coke. She eagerly takes it, going for a large sip before answering him with a contented smile, “well, the red rocks, the forest, and the weather.”

Mason huffs, “the rocks and forest are pretty awesome indeed, but I don’t know about the weather.”

“At least it’s warm here.” Caroline rolls her eyes, “you try staying in northern Europe for a year. I mean, the scenery’s amazing, but a girl’s gotta stick to a healthy dose of sunshine and heat. And sundresses.”

Mason nods while contemplating her up and down playfully, “yeah, the weather here obviously agrees with you,” he gestures to her flowery attire, “and the sundress of course.” After sharing a laugh he changes the topic, “I take it you are world traveling?”

“I _was_ world traveling.” Caroline lowers her eyes, playing absent-mindedly with the straw, an unreadable expression clouding her face, “I’m going home now.” The last sentence rolls off her tongue like a magical spell, just the sound of it lighting the flames deep buried in her soul, filling her with warmth and draining her with longing at the same time.

“And where is home if I may ask?” Mason watches her curiously.

Caroline pushes a few strands of hair out of her face with a wry smile, “I’m not sure.” She shakes her head a little, biting her lips for a few moments before continuing, “I haven’t always been a lone wolf you know. I left my pack five years ago and I’ve been…out of touch since. I heard from some other wolf they were moving around quite a bit these days.”

The day she heard that news she got completely drunk for the first time in five years. People often say that you are supposed to go wild and loosen up on these trips, getting inebriated on both the views and the liquor. But Caroline hasn’t been so much as tipsy on her long tour. No complementing the sunset in Sydney with bottles of champagne, no doing shots with fellow travelers in the gloomy alleys of London, no vodka stream to ward off the coldness of Moscow. The world had so much to offer and she wasn’t about to waste a second in meaningless alcohol.

Yet the day she heard that her pack was no longer in Mystic Falls where she was heading straight to, she drank herself shot and shot into oblivion. For the past five years she had tasted loneliness and nostalgia and a craving almost as strong as the pull of the full moon, but never had she felt so lost. For an instant the pain was so unbearable as if she was being stripped of her roots.

Her pack. And her…beta.

“I see.” Mason now has a knowing smirk on his face, “childhood sweetheart? Soul mate? Love of your life?”

“How about all of the above?” Caroline laughs, not bothering to ask how Mason has guessed. She’s been told millions of times she’s practically an open book. “But you better not let him hear you say that. He’ll be so embarrassed he’d probably pick a fight with you just to cover it up.” She twirls a little smugly on her stool, “and I won’t lie. He’s a great fighter.”

Mason doesn’t seem to mind her bragging, carrying on their conversation good-naturedly, “he must have been pretty reluctant to let you go.”

“Actually, he supported me without a doubt.” Caroline looks outside the window, the shining waves of the Oak Creek River reflected in her eyes like sweet memories reviving, “he’s always been able to see me for not only what I am, but what I could be.”

* * *

_Mystic Falls, 2006_

Hearing the approaching footsteps a few feet away, Caroline tilted her head further into the soft grass she was lying on, hiding a smile that she just couldn’t suppress. She called out without opening her eyes, “surprise, surprise. You found me.”

The golden sunlight behind her eyelids was suddenly blocked away, an amused voice following, “that’s because you are a person willing to be found.” She felt him sitting down right beside her, their hands so close the tiny hairs on the back were touching tentatively, the tickling sensation making the corners of her lips turn up a little more. Or was it the grass?

“That’s so not true.” She protested half-heartedly, her eyes still closed, “I took extra care to disappear from the party quietly, without anyone noticing.”

“Anyone but me.”

Caroline laughed, this time opening her eyes to whack him on the thigh. He grimaced, mouthing the word “ouch” dramatically. She gave a little snort, but reached out to run a few soothing circles on the spot she just hit, “you don’t count. Is there anything that you don’t notice? I swear Klaus you are the most observant person I’ve ever seen, borderline paranoid. You are like…a hawk, or something.”

“Is that so?” Klaus lifted his eyebrows, eyes squinted with a teasing little smile, “hey, what kind of earrings was Elena wearing when you left?”

“Oh the green lime stone ones her mother gave her last year. She was wearing the silver pair this morning, but from what I saw Matt accidentally spilled drink on her shoes so she had to change them, but then those earrings didn’t go with the new shoes so…” she halted in her speech, noticing his pointed look and barely contained laughter, “oh ha-ha, very funny.” She pushed him roughly to the side, “I’m a girl. I’m supposed to catch up on these things.”

“No Caroline.” Klaus straightened up, still laughing, “well yes, but not entirely.” His eyes softened almost instantly, “admit it or not, you are always watching everything going on around you with sharp eyes. Just like me.”

Caroline shrugged, “I’m a control freak. It’s annoying, I know.” She turned around to the other side, facing him with her back.

A hand reached over to pinch her slightly on the cheek. Caroline batted it away with a huff, but his next words surprised her mid-motion, “it’s adorable.” The cheek he just touched suddenly felt hot and flushed, so Caroline rolled back to press it into the cool grass. She cleared her throat before speaking, her eyes looking down, “how did you find me anyway?”

Klaus lay down next to her, arms folded under his head, “this is your favorite spot, isn’t it?” He gave her a side peek, “an open clearing with enough sun, thick grass, no mud or dirt, close enough to the party to hear the faint music and cheering, but not close enough to actually run into anyone-unless they know where to look.”

Caroline rolled her eyes, “show off.” But a smile adorned her lips on its own accord. She didn’t ask him how he knew all these things about her that no one else would have guessed in a million years, and he didn’t ask why she sneaked out of her best friend Elena’s birthday party-a party she planned no less.

Silence had never sit quite well with Caroline. She knew a lot of people enjoyed it-hell she knew a lot of people appreciated someone who enjoyed it, but she couldn’t stand it no matter what. To Caroline it was like this incomprehensible monstrosity that constantly ate at her, a void that threatened to swallow her up whole with each passing second and she just had to fill it up with trivial chatter and frivolous converse. Really she’d feed her soul to it if needed.

But not with Klaus. In Klaus’ presence, silence somehow felt not only tolerable, but even…comforting sometimes. Maybe it was because she knew that she would never be a nuisance whenever she decided to break it.

“Have you ever felt like you don’t belong?” She looked up at him, noticing the dark shadows passing through his features, immediately embarrassed by her impropriety. He was abandoned at birth, shifting from pack to pack because of some selfish alphas who didn’t care enough about the well-being of a child that wasn’t their own. Of course he’d felt like an outcast. Why did she always have to go and say the wrongest wrong things? She squeezed his hand with a frown, stuttering, “I’m…I’m so sorry, Klaus, I didn’t mean…”

To her utter surprise, Klaus squeezed back reassuringly, “I know.” He smiled at her, retreating his hand to tuck a stray curl behind her ear, “and I’ll take that as a rhetorical question.”

“well, yeah, kinda…” she smiled back hesitantly, “it’s just that, sometimes I’m in a big crowd and everyone’s partying hard, drinking, dancing, laughing, talking to each other, and I suddenly feel that I don’t fit in. Like, at all.” Her voice was barely audible, “it’s like I’m this odd piece in a puzzle, and it’s a nice picture with or without me.”

Klaus propped his head up with one hand, “you know that’s not true, love.” He watched her face closely as if trying to read something out of it, “you are the alpha of the pack. Without you this pack would fall apart and we’d all be lost for sure.”

Unexpected rage pierced through Caroline’s heart and she jumped into a sitting position, tossing her hands up with a frustrated growl, “that’s just _it_! I’m the alpha. Everyone comes to me and stays close to me and maybe even looks up to me only because I’m the alpha.” She bit her lip hard, plucking several leaves of grass in preoccupation, the fresh smell of plant bleeding into the air fueling her fury, “I seem popular and likable as the alpha, not as myself, as _Caroline_.”

“Sweetheart you are overthinking things-” Klaus tried to reason with her only to be cut short by her shriek.

“Don’t you dare patronize me!” She pointed a finger at him warningly, the broken grass in her palm flying out in the process, hitting him right in the face. Klaus stared at her wide-eyed and Caroline deflated almost instantly, wiping the stains on his cheekbone in a rush, “sorry…that was uncalled for.” She sighed, “see? I can’t even get mad properly.”

Her hand hovered over his face in a moment of disorientation and Klaus caught it inside his, running his thumb across the knuckles comfortingly, “that’s part of your charm, sweetheart.” His eyes bore into hers, the look so intense she found herself sucked into the pools of blue without so much as a chance to breathe.

“You know how many incompetent alphas I’ve seen?” he continued in a low voice, “they were all arrogant, entitled. They didn’t care what their pack members thought of them as a person, as long as they didn’t undermine their authority and obeyed their every bidding. Don’t take me wrong-they were good fighters, providers of the pack, but they were also cold and selfish. If ever the need arose they’d throw you to the wolves-or in our case, other deadly supernatural beings-without a blink.”

He sat up, inching closer to her, still holding her hand, “but you are different, Caroline. You connect with your pack. You try your best to be there for them. Remember the first time April turned?”

Caroline nodded, a little confused. April was a year younger than her, but a few months ago when she was driving into town someone jumped out of nowhere in front of her car, and her curse was thus triggered. The poor girl was scared out of her mind, having to turn at such a young age.

“You didn’t have to be there-Sheila was guiding her through it. But you never left her side, did you?” Klaus tilted his head towards her, his dimples coming out in a gentle smile.

Caroline swallowed, averting her eyes, “it wasn’t like I was gonna get hurt or anything.” It was in their instinct to not hurt one of their own after shifting.

Klaus snorted, “tell that to the heartless scums when I first turned.” This time it was his turn to look away, not acknowledging Caroline’s curious gaze, “the point is, you are fiercely loyal, and that makes you a fine wolf, and a worthy alpha.” He looked back at her, his tone now heavy and serious, the ordeals he had been through in his young life seeping through, “no matter how much human-like we may seem, we are wolves. World’s cruel, life’s tough, there’s no avoiding it.”

“And people might not think of you when they want to share the latest gossip; they might forget to seek you out for a harmless heart-to-heart or sleep-over; they might lack the decency to keep you in their boring social loop,” he huffed at those words, and yet his eyes holding hers were soft with so much care, like she was a precious jewel and he could keep any scratch or abrasion from her with merely his gaze, “but at the end of the day, when faced with threat or crisis, you’ll always be the first on their mind, because they know they can count on you.”

He sighed deeply, his eyes suddenly hard and his expression almost apologetic, although Caroline couldn’t figure out why. “It’s hardly fair, sweetheart,” he caressed her cheekbone with a single finger, “but it’s their fault, not yours.”

“And what about you?” the question blurted out before she even noticed, “will you always think of me on a bad day?”

He chuckled slightly, his eyes a bright blue color, lighted with pure affection, “that’s downplaying it a bit too much, love.” He lowered his head, seeming abashed all of a sudden, peering at her through his lashes, “to me…any day spent with you is a gift. You make a dark day normal, a normal day shine, and a shiny day unforgettable.”

Caroline blushed furiously, “you are so cheesy.”

He snorted loudly, faking indignance, “I’ll have you know that one was a hundred percent original.”

She laughed at his childish antics before shaking her head, “even if you are right, and maybe I am a great problem-fixer, it still can’t hide the fact that I’m…I’m shallow.” She lowered her head once again to play with her intricate braid.

“Why would you think that?” He sounded so shocked and Caroline’s anger-at him or at herself she couldn’t decide-was back full force.

“You see this?” She waved the end of her braid at him. Her hair was neatly done in a complicated pattern, shiny blond curls woven into delicate tiny braids all around her forehead, framing her heart-shaped face before gathering at the side and knitted into another longer braid decorated with carefully-placed little white flowers.

“Yes,” Klaus contemplated her hair with appreciation, “very elegant. Ancient Greek style I presume?”

Caroline nodded, taken aback, “yeah, I um…saw it from a blog and thought I’d try it out.”

“I remember seeing a sculpture with similar hairstyle in Athens,” Klaus smiled, “though I must say the object wasn’t nearly as beautiful as you.”

Caroline blushed before realizing they were off-topic, huffing in annoyance, “well it took me more than two hours to get it right, just because I wanted to look good and different at a party that wasn’t even mine! Two whole hours on my hair! I mean, you can’t get more superficial than that if you tried.”

“And when did you get up this morning?” Klaus asked with an expression much too amused for her liking.

“Five. Why? I have to get to the party on time.” She shrugged, not sure what that had to do with her point.

Klaus opened his arms, “exactly. You got up at five o’clock in the morning to make sure that you could properly arrange this party that you planned while looking amazingly nice. I don’t see anything superficial about effort and hard work.”

“Well when you put it like that…” Caroline pouted, trying to gather her tangling thoughts, “but I just want to be deep and mysterious for once, like Elena and Bonnie, you know? Reading, writing journals, talking about life and souls and universe, being spontaneous.” She looked up at him almost miserably, “it’s bad enough I’m a blonde. I have to go reinforcing the stereotype and only care about clothes and make-up and stupid chick flicks.”

“Hey, I’m a blonde too.” Klaus gently pulled her braid.

“But you are one of the deep ones.” Caroline fixed him a weak glare, “have you seen the looks on the girls’ faces when you talked about the Louvre? They were totally swooned.”

Klaus stared her for a few seconds, a pondering look on his face before suddenly taking her hand and pulling her up to her feet, “come on, love. Let’s go.”

“Go where?” Caroline asked while already falling into steps after him.

Klaus looked back at her with an intriguing smile, “I’ve seen your favorite spot. Now let me show you mine.”

Ten minutes later Caroline found herself sitting by a stream deep in the woods. She had never been to this part of the woods before-it was too dangerous for underage wolves like her who hadn’t triggered the curse. It was quiet, far from where their pack resided, the only sound the water running into low-reaching branches of the shrubs and the occasional chirping from unknown birds.

“Look at the water.” Klaus said quietly after letting the view sink in for a few minutes.

She tilted her head at him, “that’s a little too Disney even for me.”

“Not your _reflection_ ,” he rolled his eyes, though a small smile was tugging at his lips, “look at the stream.”

Caroline followed his words and refocused on the stream before her eyes. It really was just a tiny rivulet flowing through the massiveness of protruding roots, sheltering branches and fallen leaves. But from where they were sitting, the sunlight hit the surface of the water at just the right angle, turning it into a belt of liquid gold and diamonds, shinier than the sun itself. And suddenly the silence of the woods was overruled by this running verse of light, its every wave a laughter, every whirlpool a sigh.

“It’s…breathtaking.” Caroline whispered in awe.

“It is.” Klaus replied in a similar tone, “It always amazes me how the stream catches every drop of sun and amplifies it tenfold. How such a small body of water can light up miles of dark woods in your eyes. How vivacious it is. How resilient.” She felt his eyes on her when he uttered the next words, “it reminds me of you, Caroline.”

Surprised, she turned to look at him, and his eyes lighted up further at the sight of hers, as if she was brighter than the shining stream just inches away from them. “Me?” the word tasted foreign on her tongue.

“Is it so hard to believe?” Klaus smirked, “you are strong, beautiful, full of light. People may call this shallow,” he reached out a hand to touch the water, “but I know better.” He looked back at her, his eyes half blue from his irises and half gold from the reflection, “every stream leads to the ocean, sweetheart.”

Caroline stared at him speechless, his words resonating in her mind so strongly her vision wobbled a little. Her heart was hammering like crazy and for a few moments the only things she could recognize in sight was the golden lights dancing all around her and his intense gaze. Maybe that was why she missed the motion of his hand and the next second cold water hit her right in the face, breaking her out of the trance.

Caroline blinked through the droplets of water to see Klaus laughing with his hand still immersed in the stream, “never let those arbitrary concepts hinder your perspective, love. Shallow? Deep? In your face?” He gestured towards her, laughing harder, “beauty is beauty.”

Wiping her face, she couldn’t help laughing together with him. But as soon as her hands left her face they rushed to gather a handful of water and flipped it at him in retaliation, “I’ll tell you all about beauty in your face.” She pushed another wave of water at him, laughing loudly at his dripping blonde curls. Klaus grinned through the droplets devilishly before pushing her into the stream, but Caroline was quick to latch on to his arm and he slipped into the knee-deep water right after her.

Soon they were forgetting all about their conversation, devoted in their newly-discovered game of water fight and ten minutes or so later yielded the two of them sitting back on the bank, drenched from head to toe, laughing uncontrollably.

“Great, now my elegant hair is ruined.” Caroline wiggled her brows at him, trying to undo her mess of a braid, but failing miserably from the soaking wet locks.

Klaus reached over quietly, his laughter finally dying down, “let me.”

Caroline turned around without a word, suddenly nervous as a deer caught in spotlight. She felt his fingers in her hair, freeing strand after strand, his motions so gentle as not to hurt her. She tilted her head to the other side, intending to hide her blush from him, but he protested in a low voice, “stay still.” His hot breath burned the back of her neck and Caroline felt so hot all of a sudden despite her wet clothes.

A drop of water slowly rolled down her neck into her dress and she could hear his abrupt intake of air. “There, it’s done.” He quickly backed away a few inches from her, and Caroline’s head remained lowered, her hands came up to wring her hair quietly.

“So…you don’t think I’m shallow?” She spoke up, desperate to find a new focus other than the sense of his fingers still in her hair or his breath still on her skin.

He huffed a laugh, probably on to her tactics, “and we are back at this. No, I don’t think you are shallow. On the contrary, I consider you a constant delight, down to your need for endless conversation and poorly veiled deflection.”

“So you don’t think I talk too much?” She ignored the deflection part.

Klaus opened his mouth to say something, but closed it on second thought, his lips curling into an indulging smile, “no, Caroline. Surprisingly I enjoy your talking more than I would have thought.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Now Caroline was genuinely intrigued by his strange wording.

Klaus hesitated for a while, his brows knitted in deep contemplation, “for a long time, I thought all wolves shared the same trait of reticence. We rely on feels rather than thoughts, taking things in rather than expressing them out loud. It made sense, given our dire need for survival.” He licked his lips as if embarrassed by what he was about to say, “when I was a child I was very fond of…art. I picked up pencils and paper whereas other children just picked fights with each other. I…I guess I was ashamed of it.”

Caroline saw the dark shadows in his eyes so clearly she shuddered involuntarily. And yet she also saw how wound up Klaus was, his shoulders stiff and back rigid. She guessed there was more to the story, but she wasn’t about to push him further, not today at least. So she went for a lighter route instead, “no kidding! You are an artist? What do you do, paintings? Sketches?”

Klaus smiled a little at her excitement, “a bit of everything. But I haven’t been doing it for several years now.” He pushed the wet locks out of her face, looking her deep in the eyes, “that’s one of the reasons I enjoy you really. You are so expressive with your words, conveying everything in colors. It makes my hand itch to draw.”

Caroline returned his smile, leaning slightly into his hand, “then start drawing.” She didn’t know which was hotter, her cheek or his palm, and she didn’t care at that moment, “it’s part of who you are. Don’t let anyone deny it, not even yourself.”

His eyes widened at her words, his eyelashes quivering imperceptibly under a sheen of moisture. Slowly he leaned towards her, closer and closer, and Caroline was afraid that he would hear her frantic heartbeats. In a long, agonizing yet sweet second she felt his lips brushing the crown of her head, and his silky voice in her hair, “maybe I will.”

A drop of water fell from her hair tips to her pinky, shining in the sun like a silent promise.


	3. Chapter 3

_Sedona, 2016_

Klaus doesn’t know what is happening to him. Maybe it’s the full moon, or the fact that it’s one of those days when he’s reminded of Caroline by accident or divine intervention and then everything around him turns to a reminder. Her scent, the color of her eyes, her habits and quirks. All the random little things coaxing his thoughts back to her-Klaus almost feels like one of those artificial intelligence things gone wrong and the only thing he can recognize and decipher is the code of Caroline.

And maybe that’s why on today of all days, when his pack is waiting for him in the forest just hours from the full moon comes up, he finds himself in this nondescript little diner, drinking cheap whiskey with the waiter that he’s known for all about thirty minutes, baring his heart out-more or less.

“Isn’t it too early for alcohol anyway?” Klaus lifts his brows at Mason, taking another sip.

Mason snorts at that, “dude, you’ve got girl trouble, and that calls for a drink without judgment any time of the day.”

“It’s been five years. She’s not a girl anymore.” Klaus runs his thumb along the rim of the tumbler, picturing her matured face against his sensible mind.

“Well she’s _your_ girl,” Mason shrugs, taking a sip of his own, “or your alpha, whatever you say.” His eyes flickers for a split second, but before Klaus notices he carries on with the chatter, “so what’s your deal exactly? You said you guys met when you were both young. Did you, like, establish it later?”

“I didn’t have a letter jacket to give to her if that’s what you mean.” Klaus chuckles over his glass, “she probably would have liked it though. Living out one of her fantasies.”

Mason swishes the drink in his hand, seeming pensive, “it’s a little hard to imagine though. I wouldn’t have guessed…” At Klaus’ look of inquiry he quickly catches himself, “I mean, this girl you were talking about sounds very American sweetheart, the bubbly perky cheerleader type, and you are just…well, British, for lack of a better term.”

Klaus rolls his eyes at him, “and here I thought I was an _Aussie_.” He reaches over to grab the bottle behind the counter and fills his now empty glass, “this is, of course, on the house.” It isn’t a question.

Mason tuts before snatching the bottle back, “who made you the boss here?”

“I did offer you a nice story and all.” Klaus winks at him teasingly.

Mason gives him an incredulous look, “what is this, the Arabian Nights? And if I remember correctly that lady told the stories to save people, not bankrupt innocent bystanders.” He grimaces before putting the bottle back on the shelf, “I don’t have that many free drinks to serve you.”

“You don’t have that many lives for me to spare.” Klaus deadpanned.

Mason winces at his matter-of-fact tone, “says the one who isn’t even the alpha. You sure are scary for a mere beta.”

“Believe me, you are lucky to deal with me rather than Caroline. She’d kill you with kindness.” Klaus points a finger at him, “or her sharp tongue and one mean right hook.” Or her perfect smile and melodic voice and the sight of her leaving and her memories that haunt you day and night. But he isn’t about to go there.

Mason smirks knowingly, “for some reason I don’t doubt that.” He suddenly furrows his brows, “wait, you said her parents died when she was little right? Fighting vamps?” Seeing Klaus nod he continues his question, “then she grew up alone? Man that’s tough.”

Klaus shakes his head, “not exactly. The elders in our pack were responsible for training her, but one of the elders kind of took her under her wings. Practically raised Caroline as her own granddaughter.” A wistful hint of smile appeared on his face, “she was one hell of a woman, Miss Sheila.”

“And she was okay with you being the beta?” Mason rubs his chin, “don’t take me wrong, but you were the new guy in the pack.”

“She was surprisingly supportive.” Klaus reminisces, looking into the amber liquid before him, “in her own ways of course. Not long after I was appointed beta Caroline had to negotiate something with another pack, so she left town with another elder for a few days, leaving me in charge. I wasn’t so sure about that, still feeling out of place, so generally just acting awkward with everyone. Sheila was pissed.” He chuckles, “told me to ‘man up’ and get on with it.”

Mason laughs, “she does sound pretty bad-ass.”

“The most.” Klaus raises his glass in a gesture of salute. He hadn’t expected it back then but when Caroline left town five years ago, leaving him yet again in charge of the pack, indefinitely no less, it was Sheila’s words he heard in his head.

So ‘man up’ he did.

And that was the final thing Miss Sheila taught him, even after her death. That whatever touches your soul never leaves. They grow into you, with you, from you, until the day comes when you realize that even left infinitely and utterly alone, they’ll always be a part of your loneliness. And with that the loneliness becomes a strength.

A strength he can draw from till they meet again.

* * *

_Mystic Falls, 2007_

The steady sound of charcoal scratching on paper felt so right to Klaus nowadays. Soothing. Every line ran smoothly from the tip of his fingers, depicting the world as exactly how he saw it. He could dive into the intricately managed patterns of light and shadow, letting lose without relinquishing control. It seemed almost like second nature.

He’d picked up his sketchpad shortly after he had that chat with Caroline in the woods. His first object was, without a doubt, her. He’d captured her face after their water fight, wet curls and blushing cheeks, glowing in the sunlight. Upon finishing, he was too scared to show it to her-his skills were rusty from the lack of practice. But Caroline, being Caroline, pried the drawing out of his hand before he knew it, and the smile on her face immediately elicited his urge to do another.

He had been through so many sketch books since then he’d lost count. At first the only things in them were landscape, still life, and Caroline. But over the years, other people had gradually made their appearances. Caroline’s friend Bonnie, the little human boy who smiled at him behind the white fence every time he went into town, April who was always begging shyly for another travel story, pack members who drank and joked with him.

And now Miss Sheila.

He fixed the lines around her eyes a little, stopping to contemplate the whole thing. He decided the spot under her left eye needed some more shading but before he resumed his work, a hand reaching from the side beat him to it, blending the lower lines with the tip of a finger. Klaus smiled at the hand. She was getting good at this, though she always claimed she couldn’t draw a stick figure to save her life.

But then again, they spent enough time together as it was. He had to rub off on her a bit.

“I already miss her.” He heard her small voice from the crook of his shoulder, her breath smelling like her strawberry lip gloss and alcohol.

He held her extended hand in his while putting the finishing touches on the sketch with the other, “so do I.”

“It was quick though. The doctor said she wasn’t in much pain. That’s good.” Caroline sighed against his skin.

Klaus didn’t point out that she’d already repeated that line too many times. The night Sheila passed away from heart attack, the following days when they were preparing for the funeral, earlier today at the wake. He just slowly rubbed her knuckles with his thumb, agreeing with her quietly, “yes it is.”

“There was something that I didn’t say at the wake.” Caroline said after a while, lifting her head from his shoulder.

Klaus felt slightly disappointed at the loss of the weight, but he didn’t make a sound, just closing the sketch book and turning to face her. After the funeral the whole pack gathered around, sharing memories about Sheila with each other. He noticed Caroline stopping mid-sentence one time. She covered it up quickly, and he let it slip at the time.

“I remember when I was seven…a few months before my parents got killed,” Caroline pulled up her legs, hugging them in front of her chest, her eyes downcast, “my father said that I was old enough to learn the first lesson of being the future alpha.” Her voice had a gravely tone to it and Klaus dreaded what she was about to say although it was all in the past.

“He wanted to take me to the woods on a full moon, to see them shift.” Caroline huffed a humorless laugh, “I was terrified. I knew they were wolves by concept, but the mere thought of my mom and dad, and so many people I knew of turning into howling beasts just scared me to the bones. Also Elena and Bonnie were having a sleep-over that night.”

She sucked in a deep breath, as if bracing herself for what was to come next, “I cried for hours, begging him to not do this. Dad was furious. Said I was a disappointment. Not strong enough to be an alpha.”

Klaus reached out to run a comforting hand through her hair, cursing bloody insane fathers inside his head, “you were just seven. He shouldn’t have asked that of you.”

Caroline leaned back a little into his touch, “mom tried to talk him out of it, but he locked me in my room, ready to drag me out with them at dusk.” She chuckled quietly, this time the mood lighter, “that was where Sheila came in. She heard the commotion and came straight to our house. Called my dad an idiot to his face. And when he refused to let me out, she broke the door of my room.”

She looked up at him, a tiny smile breaking through, “oh, did I tell you she brought an axe with her?” Klaus laughed in response. That sounded about right. Miss Sheila had always been a tough lady with a gut made of steel.

“She hugged me and led me out of my house, all this time still holding her big-ass axe. She warned my father that if he didn’t quit the crazy act she’d gather the elders and kick him out of his own pack.” Caroline giggled, “for months after that whenever I had a nightmare I’d ask for Sheila. My dad was beyond annoyed.”

Klaus tucked a few fallen strands of hair behind her ear, longing to see her smile without anything blocking his sight, “that’s a nice story. Sheila would’ve been glad you remembered.”

Caroline nodded before turning to the side, retrieving the remaining bottle of whiskey they left untouched, “this calls for another drink.” She took a sip straight from the bottle, squinting at the burn, letting out a little sigh. She then handed the bottle to Klaus, her tongue darting out to lick her liquor-stained lips.

Klaus took the bottle absent-mindedly, tearing his gaze from her wet rosy lips, drinking down a large mouthful to quench the sudden thirst burning through him. He put the bottle down between them, leaning back on the trunk of the tree they were sitting under, “Sheila was actually the first one I’d met from the pack.”

He felt Caroline leaning back alongside him, the tips of her hair tickling his neck, “yeah, I figured. She was mostly in charge then.”

“I was wary of her at the first sight.” Klaus thought back to Sheila’s keen dark eyes. He didn’t quite do them justice in his sketch. They were always sharp but understanding, two features that wasn’t supposed to coexist, but balanced perfectly on her, “she seemed too calm and knowing. I couldn’t figure her out.”

“Ayanna was trying to make up some excuse to explain why none of those packs in Europe wanted to keep me for long.” He snorted, “she wasn’t doing a great job of it. I almost laughed out loud at her poor reasoning. Sheila must have noticed my expression.” He shook his head, still amazed at how observant she was, “nothing escaped her eyes really. So she stopped Ayanna’s charade and said, ‘no need covering the real reason behind. You know it, I know it, this young man here knows it as well’.”

Caroline giggled just below his ear, repeating the phrase “young man” amused. Klaus had to close his eyes briefly to suppress the beast inside him answering to the sensation, “she agreed to let me stay without another word. Later when Ayanna was gone, she made me a promise. And that was when I knew she was different.”

“What promise?” Caroline looked up at him intrigued, her lips almost touching his jaw line.

Klaus swallowed hard before continuing, “she promised that no one would lay a hand on me, hurt me with words or try to kick me out of the pack under her watch.” He didn’t know how she’d speculated about his abusive foster father or those selfish packs, or she was just that perceptive, “she also told me that the rest was on my own.”

He expected another sound of laughter from her, but Caroline was quiet. When she sat up straight to peer at him she had a pensive look on her face, “Klaus…did your foster parents…” Her eyes were suddenly frantic from what she was implying, the blue orbs watery against her pale complexion.

Klaus sighed averting his eyes. Caroline was too smart for her own good. He should have known she could well figure it out from his few words, and yet he still wasn’t ready to share more than he’d let slipped, “it’s all bygones now.”

Probably sensing his distress, Caroline didn’t respond to his dismissive answer, just putting her hand in his without further motion. He let it rest there for a minute before his own need to touch her prevailed and he slowly closed his fingers around hers, feeling the softness grounding him more firmly than the giant oak tree behind.

“She was right you know.” Caroline said after a while, “you did a pretty good job yourself, fitting in and winning people over.”

“Because you named me the beta.” Till this day Klaus couldn’t quite wrap his mind around that one, how trusting Caroline was of him when they first met, but he’d long given up on analyzing it. Some things just were. And he was strangely comforted by that mentality. “It’s a little difficult for the pack to ostracize the second in command.”

Caroline snorted, the corner of her lips curling up, “oh quit it. Everyone loves you and you know it.”

_What about you?_ Klaus almost asked out loud but he caught himself at the last minute, shrugging nonchalantly, “not more than they fear me. Didn’t you hear the words out there? I am, quote, ‘the devil bastard’, embodiment of nightmare, and my body count on a single full moon can rival that of a whole pack’s.”

“Okay, are you now fishing compliments or what?” Caroline squinted at him, half teasing and half fed up, “cause you know damn well those rumors were concocted by our own pack to scare away potential enemies.” And the result of a foolish drinking game. “And don’t pretend you don’t help out whenever someone’s in trouble in your sight.”

Klaus tried to scoff, but Caroline shoved a finger in his face, “uh-uh, no denying.” She suddenly started to giggle, and Klaus glared at her in confusion, “the girls actually made a bet about it. You know, carrying a bunch of firewood and accidentally drop it a few feet from you, that kind of thing. The stone-faced knight always comes to the rescue,” she sing-songed, “with a scowl, of course.”

“Why have I never heard of this, love?” Klaus huffed exasperatedly.

“Well, we don’t want to ruin your _image._ ” Caroline wiggled her brows, “god forbid anyone knows you are such a push-over.” She grinned, “Sheila must have seen right through you.”

Klaus wanted to protest, but conceded at the soft look in her eyes, “that she has.”

Caroline bent over, once again picking up the whiskey between them, “to Miss Sheila. The most amazing wolf ever.” She toasted before drinking.

Klaus took the bottle from her, “to Miss Sheila. May her stories never fade, and her spirit stay with us.” He drank from the bottle, squeezing her hand slightly.

For a few minutes they just sat there, passing the bottle back and forth, taking turns to drink from it. Eventually Caroline broke the silence, “I do feel like that, you know?” Her speech was slower than usual due to the alcohol she just consumed, “like she’s still with us. She used to tell me about the other side. Said my parents were watching over me from there.”

“It’s possible.” Klaus mused, “she was too protective to leave us unattended.”

Suddenly Caroline pushed herself into his arms, her head reclaiming its place on his shoulder, “do you ever feel like we’ve already lost so much? My parents died, yours did too. Bonnie’s parents left her for god knows what. Not to mention those stupid packs who turned their backs on you, or your foster families. Shame on them!” She exclaimed a bit too profusely, clearly worked up by the whiskey, “it’s like everything, everyone…just leaves. Vanishes. Whoosh.”

Her lips puckered making the sound and Klaus felt his head swoon at the sight. Caroline on the other hand was still lost in her thought, “but that’s not gonna be the case with us.”

“No it’s not.” The words flew out of his mouth all too quickly, and yet the second he registered what he’d uttered he knew it was the truth. For all that he’d lost or perhaps never had in the first place he hoped desperately that Caroline wouldn’t be one of them. But more importantly, he would ensure Caroline never suffered from a loss ever again if he could help it, and even if he couldn’t no way in hell would that loss be himself.

Caroline hummed softly, seemingly satisfied with his conviction, “yeah, we are going to be together forever.” She pointed a finger to his chest, then to herself, “you, and me. Because I’m your alpha, and you are my beta.”

Klaus drew back at those familiar words as if burned. He looked up into Caroline’s perplexed eyes, not able to keep the anger from his subdued voice, “is that all I am to you?”

“What?” Caroline stared at him stunned, her brows furrowed, “what are you talking about?”

Klaus breathed in deeply, the overabundant oxygen making him dizzy for a split second before fueling the flames already running rampant inside him. He knew this was hardly the right time or circumstance for this conversation, but his chest felt like exploding from all the secrets he’d been holding in, “I’m talking about the fact that you see me as nothing more than your beta, your right hand guy.”

The puzzled look on Caroline’s face slowly morphed into one mixed with hurt and fury, “and what’s so wrong about that? I trust you with all my heart. You are one of the most important people to me and I can’t imagine my life without you.”

Klaus stood up abruptly and started pacing, his jaw clenched painfully. He longed to pull Caroline into his arms till they melt as one as much as he wanted to push her to the other end of the world, both notions sending unbearable dread through his chaos of a mind. His agitation channeled into cold sarcasm instead, “that was beautiful, sweetheart. We both know how good you are with words and manipulation.”

“Don’t you sweetheart me!” Caroline pushed herself up from the ground, standing right in front of him, her face flushed from rage, “you know what Klaus? You suck! You accuse me of manipulating you with words when you are the one beating around the bush, throwing stupid nicknames just to prove you can be hurtful.”

Klaus winced at that, knowing she had a point. But the myriads of emotions boiling in his chest were raising drastic waves, and he was soon consumed with another fit of rage at the assault, “stop being so righteous, _love_ , it’s a bit annoying to be honest. After all you are just stringing me along as your loyal lap dog.”

Caroline opened her mouth but nothing came out. She suddenly turned to the side, probably blinking back tears and Klaus’ heart constricted at the sight of her quivering chin. He was about to say something, anything to control the damage when she turned back, her eyes now blazing blue flames, “so we are sinking to _dog_ jokes now? That’s low even for you Klaus.” She stepped up until they were nose to nose, her breath searing his skin, “say what you want straight out or don’t say it at all.”

He turned away from her, putting some distance between them. But he could still hear her, every sweet breath, every swish of the softest hair and every sputter of her flowery dress in the passing breeze, all the different sensations weighing heavily on his mind and he felt so tired and loss in that moment, an inexplicable sadness gripping his heart. When he opened his mouth again his voice was low and coarse, “I can’t do this anymore.”

“Do what? I don’t understand.” Her hand touched his elbow tentatively, only to be shaken away ruthlessly.

Klaus turned back swiftly towering over her, his fists clenched as he growled, “false camaraderie. Faked intimacy. This pathetic little alpha-beta game of yours.”

Caroline blinked furiously as if she’d just been slapped, her words trembling along with her whole body, “this is _not_ a game.”

“Then what do you propose we call it, love?” Klaus’ lips twitched into a cruel smirk, his voice raising, “whatever it is I don’t want anything to do with it. I don’t want your company. I don’t want your pity. I don’t want you playing house with me like a vapid human girl. We are wolves Caroline. We don’t need to glue ourselves to anything insignificant for the sole purpose of fending off loneliness, which I’m pretty sure we are doing all this time, pretending to be special to each other when we clearly are not!”

His chest heaved from the rant, but he felt cold from deep within. He carefully rid his face of all expressions, ready for her to snap and leave him at any minute. Yet Caroline was never one to stick to his expectations. She studied him silently for a few seconds, her face as blank as his. And then slowly, the corners of her lips turned up infinitesimally, hinting the beginning of a smile.

And what a smile it was.

Just one look into her bright, gentle eyes Klaus found his resolve chipping away. He detected something different in her, but she spoke up before he could figure it out, “I thought I told you to be straightforward.” She gave him a reproachful look with her _smiling_ eyes and Klaus felt slightly chagrined, but not more than the relief flooding him.

“But never mind. I’ll take over from here.” She reached up to cup his cheeks in her palms, “you were right about one thing. We are wolves. We are cursed by nature, slaves of the moon. We are bound to live a bumpy life with perpetual suffering and intervals of happiness. We are sad creatures who know darkness before light, pain before joy, violence before kindness.” She inched closer to him, their eyelashes almost brushing, “so we don’t mistake what is the most precious to us. And when we find it,” her eyes locked with his, “we never let go.”

And then her lips were on his.

The kiss started out light and gentle, like she was reacquainting with him, until their warmth blended, their shapes fitted and their breaths came in sync. Caroline started to nibble on his lower lip, and that was all the sign Klaus needed. He took her lips with more force, worshiping every inch of the velvety flesh. He felt her hot fingers caressing his cheekbone, with so much passion and care as if she was holding his heart and Klaus couldn’t help but sink his own fingers into her hair, pulling her closer still.

After a few moments Caroline broke away just a tiny crack. She whispered against their still touching lips, each word another eager and confirming kiss, “I’m your alpha,” she whispered curtly, her eyes saying all the things that held too much weight to be uttered out loud, “and you are my beta.”

A rush of desire and possession filled Klaus’ heart. Once again he dived into her, his tongue brushing her lips questioningly through the frenzy. She opened her mouth almost immediately and Klaus sighed while he devoured her, all the torturing yearn and dread finally soothed, giving way to a pure fire of longing. He held her head with one hand while the other slipped down to her back, feeling the beautiful vibration when she moaned deeply.

It felt like forever before they finally separated, both out of breath. Caroline was still staring at him with slightly watery eyes, her smile now contented and teasing. Klaus held her against his chest, reveling in the whole _Caroline_ feel and smiled back, “that was quite a speech, sweetheart.”

“I’ve been told I’m good with words.” She poked one of his dimples as punishment.

“I’ll revise that statement.” Klaus tilted his head, “you are just generally good with your tongue.”

“Really?” She batted her eyelashes at him, all smug and seductive, “then we have to put it to good use.”

“Gladly.” He laughed into the inviting lips in front of him, and the mesmerizing scent of Caroline that he would never let go.


	4. Chapter 4

_Sedona, 2016_

Caroline is on another order of fries-the ones that came with her burger long since finished. She picks one up, waving it at Mason, “you see? This is exactly the down side of talking to people. You can’t stop gorging.” She pops it into her mouth, making a face.

Mason rolls his eyes, “well you can, but you won’t. Honestly I don’t understand you girls and your obsession with snacks. You need something to go with the conversation? You’ve got booze for that.”

“Admit it, guys just think they look super cool when they are drinking.” Caroline smirks, “you’d all be taking selfies with a glass of whiskey in hand if it doesn’t clash with _your image_.” She can’t help it. She has to do the bunny-ears quotation mark with her hands.

Mason laughs at her gesture, clearly amused, “you’ve got us all pegged, huh, wolf girl?”

“Yep, pretty much.” She wiggles her brows smugly, “after all I’ve got years of practice.” Her eyes dims at that, stuffing another fry in her mouth without continuing.

Fortunately Mason’s been running the diner for a long time now. He knows when to change the subject, “so…you are going into the forest later?” He looks out at the late morning sun, “I heard there’s a pack around.”

Caroline shrugs, “well I’ll make sure to steer clear out of their way. But the Coconino’s big enough.” She turns to Mason curiously, “what about you? Ever turned in the wilderness?”

“Several times over the years.” He sounds less than enthusiastic, “I don’t think that’s really the thing for me though.” He stops a minute to gather his thoughts, his face grim, “it’s too…raw. And tempting. It feels so easy to just give in to it. They were right about this being a curse.”

“I know what you mean. I used to feel the same way.” Caroline smiles with nostalgia, “When I was little, my parents and other wolves would go deep into the woods at sunset every full moon, leaving the ones who hadn’t triggered the curse to look after us kids. I remember when the night fell we’d gather around, playing games or reading stories. And then there came the howling. All night long it never stopped.”

“Must be pretty scary.” Mason mused.

Caroline shook her head, “not really. I wasn’t so much scared of the howling itself as I was of the fact that I was drawn to it. It almost felt like every sound I heard was calling for me. I had this notion that I wasn’t supposed to connect to it, you know? Because it was the complete opposite of Disney princesses and ball gowns and singing to innocent little animals, which apparently, I enjoyed immensely.” She shared a laugh with Mason.

“So I was scared of myself when sometimes I just wanted to jump out of bed and join them in the woods. Seemed pure evil.” Caroline grimaced, “it didn’t help when I later learned about the bone breaking thing.”

Mason gives an exaggerated shudder, “yeah that one’s a bitch.”

“Tell me about it.” Over the years the shifting sped up and her pain threshold got higher, but it still sucked no matter what, “but after a while I got used to it.”

“And that’s when the fun kicked in?” Mason speculates with a raised brow.

“Sure I had fun.” Caroline thought about all the times she turned in different forests around the world, the distinct feeling of earth under her paws from soft blankets of pine needles to crunchy layer of oak leaves; of air against her fur from brisk and icy to moist and fruity. “But it’s more than the fun. It’s liberating, owning up to what you really are and enjoying it.”

“That makes sense…I guess.” Mason draws, not quite convinced but definitely intrigued by her cheery look.

“And it kicked in about five minutes after I completed my first transition.” Caroline grins.

“Now you are just showing off.” Mason snorts, before something comes to his mind, “wait, when did you trigger you curse? You look really young to have been doing this for years.”

Caroline’s expression sobers instantly, “when I was seventeen. It’s been long enough.”

Unlike so many other wolves who triggered the curse by accident, hers was intended-well planned even. She had to be able to shift in order to fully lead her pack, and that was something she would never let herself chicken out of. No matter how conflicted she may have been about the inevitable task.

Klaus was so subdued those days, staring at her with troubled eyes whenever he thought she wasn’t looking, as if he was the one about to go through the ordeal. And maybe he was-he always seemed to take her pain harder than herself.

He didn’t say anything about her choice of victim. A middle-aged guy, alcoholic, beat his child every time he was wasted. Caroline did the whole investigation-spied around his house for months. And she would always remember Klaus’ eyes when she revealed her decision to him. Those hollows where all the pain, rage, shame and loss were trapped under thin ice, threatening to break lose in a roar of fire.

And yet he hadn’t uttered a single word. Just helped her bury the body, stood by her through the ritual, and led her to a secluded cave afterwards.

To this day Caroline looks back at those times and sees him as a firm lighthouse. In retrospect there was no doubt she could have trudged through the tumultuous darkness all by herself. But he made sure she believed in her own strength even then.

“So you enjoyed it? Even the first time?” Mason’s voice brings her out of her memories, “anything to do with your beta?”

A smile blooms in Caroline’s eyes so tenderly, “you have no idea.”

He also made sure she embraced the darkness as the wolves that they both were.

* * *

_Mystic Falls, 2009_

It smelled clean. The thought came to Caroline as she sat on the ground, examining the small dark cave. She’d expected a suffocating mixture of sweat and fur and even blood, but the only thing she could detect was old leaves and a hint of water-which was how she knew they were near the falls.

As if reading her mind, Klaus spoke up from beside her, “no one’s been here except me. I discovered it a few years ago.” He waved to the entrance, “the others are probably in the vicinity. But we don’t necessarily shift together, you know. It can be somewhat…private.”

Caroline huffed a laugh, “yeah, I really don’t need to see Jenna or Miranda naked. Or John.” She made a face, “ew.”

“Ew’s about right.” Klaus smirked, but it didn’t reach his eyes.

Caroline sighed, “it’s gonna be okay, Klaus. Everyone’s been through this. Well, almost everyone.” She reached for his hand and squeezed gently, a gestured they’d shared thousands of times, “and they all came out fine. So will I.”

Klaus brought her hand to his mouth and kissed her knuckles, “of course. You are one of the strongest people I’ve met, sweetheart. You’ll turn into a ravishing wolf for sure.”

“Aw, you and your sweet talk.” Caroline batted her eyelashes at him coquettishly, trying to lighten the mood. Klaus smiled shaking his head, pulling her into his arms and held her close. Caroline inhaled deeply, his familiar woodsy scent calming her nerves. “Any minute now.” She whispered, aiming to sound cheery, but the slight tremor at the end of the sentence kind of ruined the effort.

Klaus’ hand went up into her hair, stroking in a steady rhythm, “yes, it will start soon. Given this is your first time, it may take longer to complete the transition. But don’t worry, I’ll be here the whole time.”

“Does it hurt very badly?” Caroline couldn’t stop the stupid question from rolling off of her tongue.

Klaus hesitated for a minute, “yes.” His voice was low, but the way he said it somehow made the answer bearable. That was one of the things Caroline loved about him. He never sugarcoated things. And a straight answer prepared you best for the worst. That she could handle.

“Okay.” She breathed into his shirt, closing her eyes briefly. After a few minutes she suddenly gave a humorless laugh, the sound almost eerie in the dark. She could feel his questioning eyes on her, but she remained leaning on his shoulder, “nothing. I just feel that…I kind of deserve it. The pain.”

Klaus sucked in a breath, sounding appalled, “how could you possibly think that?”

“I committed homicide. I should be in jail.” She cut off whatever he wanted to say to excuse her with a steely voice, “I don’t regret it. I did what I needed to do for the pack and that guy was a monster. But I stilled killed him.” She bit her lower lip hard enough to draw blood, “so in a way, the pain I’m about to endure is pretty justified.”

The cave fell into a heavy silence, the tension weighing on both of them until Klaus tilted her chin up, covering her lips with his. He gently licked the spot she’d bitten into before delving into her, the taste of blood tainting their mouths and she just wanted it to melt away so she could taste exactly him and nothing else. So she sucked harder, brushing her tongue everywhere she could reach, and little by little it was really just him on her tongue, all flesh and heart and soul.

When they finally broke apart, Klaus lingered a breath away a moment longer, murmuring against her lips, “you are too stubborn for your own good, sweetheart.” He gave her another affectionate peck on the lips before resuming his original posture, leaning against the wall of the cave.

Caroline looked up at him smiling teasingly, “well that’s why you like me.”

“Someone’s full of themselves tonight.” Klaus peered at her, his own lips curling into a smirk.

Caroline shrugged, “every bone in my body is going to snap in the next hour or so. At least I’m going down feeling good about myself.”

Klaus sighed again, his face now somber, “you don’t have to remind me, love.”

Caroline was quiet for a while, knowing nothing would ease his over-protective mind. It was sweet and made her warm inside but she was under enough pressure as it was, she didn’t need the extra spotlight. So she summoned up her courage and asked the question that had been hovering in her mind these past days, “Klaus…you never told me how you triggered your curse.”

When he didn’t reply immediately, she carefully turned to him to study his expression. He was facing the entrance of the cave, the moonlight shedding over his features like a silver veil, and his eyes had a glassy look in them. He seemed so isolated in his own silent despair that for a moment Caroline felt she was starting to shift-the pain piercing through her took her breath away.

“I was fourteen.” His voice was barely audible, but it still startled her, “I was staying with my foster family at the time-the one that kept me for the longest. I had a little brother, Henrik.” His lips twitched into a heartbreaking tiny curl, “he was the only good thing in my memory of that time. We used to be inseparable.”

Having a vague idea of where this was going, Caroline slowly circled her arms around his waist and rested her head against his stiff back, hugging him from behind. Klaus jerked in surprise, but took her hands in his shortly after, continuing his story, “on one full moon we sneaked out at night when all the adults were in the woods. Henrik wanted to see them shift. Unfortunately we ran into a bloody vampire. I had no idea what he was doing roaming the forest on a full moon with wolves all around, but he was there, and he spotted us immediately.”

Caroline shuddered, sensing the tragic turn, but Klaus was still as stone, “we didn’t have a chance to flee. He was too quick. The only thing I managed do was shoving Henrik to the side. The vampire fed on me, but before he could finish an elder wolf jumped out and bit him. Saved my life.”

“What about…Henrik?” Caroline was almost too afraid to ask.

“I…shoved him too hard. He fell off a slope and hit his head on a rock.” His voice sounded close to a whimper, like the faint gurgle from someone who had fallen into freezing water on a winter night, sealed under layers and layers of ice, “he didn’t make it.”

Caroline closed her eyes, not able to utter a word. Anything felt insipid and trivial in the face of this. The omnipresent web of life that no one could escape. It didn’t swallow you-that was death’s job. It only poisoned and maimed and weakened, leaving you struggling to your last breath. Incomplete, impotent, inept, but struggling.

So she just held him with all her strength till their bones dug into each other, hard enough to leave lasting bruises.

“You might be right about it, Caroline.” She heard Klaus choke out, “we deserve the pain.”

“Then we hold on. We hold on, and we don’t lose ourselves to it.” She intertwined their fingers and this time Klaus reacted, pressing his fingers into her hand like he was seeking for something, and Caroline didn’t hesitate to give it to him, “we keep in mind what we were trying to protect and we’ll pull through.” The pain, the guilt, everything. It would always be there, but it would not defeat them.

They stayed in that position until the first crack of her bone.

It was in her left upper arm. Caroline cried out in surprise, cradling it with her right one, but the next second that one started to break as well. Klaus was instantly crouching down across from her, watching her with concerned eyes, “shh, it’s alright love. It’s about time.”

Caroline groaned at another set of pain blowing up inside her. This time it was her ribs. One by one they snapped with abandon like beans shooting out of the pod. Caroline would have laughed at the ridiculous notion if not for the insane amount of pain. She squeezed her eyes shut, her breath broken just like her bones, “all the preparation I’ve done in my mind and…I still didn’t expect…this.”

Klaus reached out to stroke her sweaty forehead, “it can be overwhelming. Try not to talk too much. Save some strength.” Caroline could detect the imperceptible tremor in his calm voice, “this could take a while.”

She bit back a scream at her fingers breaking, one joint after another, “I didn’t realize…there are so many bones in me.” Uncontrollable tears were streaming down her cheeks along with big drops of sweat and Caroline didn’t even have the heart to feel ashamed about it.

But Klaus was there to wipe it away gently, “sadly you are all bones sweetheart. Tough to a fault.” Suddenly he drew back with a jerk, a low grunt grazing out of his throat. It dawned on Caroline then that his transition was starting as well.

Apparently used to the suffering, Klaus was quiet about it. His breathing was heavier and more erratic, but other than the initial grunt out of surprise, he didn’t make a single sound. Calmed by his actions Caroline focused back on her own transition. The pain was still a bitch, attacking her like never ending tides from all the places in her body that she hadn’t imagined possible. But now that she was expecting it the process became less frightening.

Yet something seemed odd and Caroline couldn’t put her already broken finger on it. After about half an hour (or maybe longer? She had lost track of time) she finally figured out what was wrong. Klaus shouldn’t be still shifting. He was older and had been doing this for six years, according to what she was told it would be faster for him, which meant he should have finished his transition by now.

“Are you…suppressing it?” Caroline managed to croak out, “Klaus-” She was interrupted by her thigh bone breaking, the pain sent her bending in half, sick to her stomach.

“Don’t worry about me, love.” Klaus’ voice cut through her foggy mind, “focus on your breathing.”

“But…” This time she heard it. The distinct crack sound coming from his side, closely following her own. Klaus was, indeed, slowing down his own transition to match the agonizing speed of hers.

“I said I’d be with you the whole time.” He breathed out.

Caroline willed her eyes open in the torturing haze, and she was instantly met with Klaus’ blue orbs. She wondered for a second what color they would be when he turned into a wolf. Would they still be this intense and penetrating like torches in the dark, or even more so. The thought felt like a balm on her hurting body, cushioning the next brutal blow when her spine began to snap.

In the sound of his mirroring crack, she whispered, “too stubborn for your own good.” And she heard his labored chuckle just inches away.

It felt like hours. There were a few times when the pain was so intense that Caroline saw white in her sight, and she almost mistook those for the light of dawn. But as long as it lasted the pain was gone in a blink. All of a sudden she heard an unhuman growl in the cave. Startled she looked down, only to see two greyish white paws.

 _Her_ paws.

Another growl echoed hers, causing Caroline to look up. Before her eyes at the entrance of the cave, bathed in silver moonlight was the most beautiful wolf she’d ever seen. He was huge, with dark grey furs akin to black, and just a hint of brownish gold around the top of his head. His eyes were glowing in the dark, fixed on her like flickering flints.

So they were _golden_. She mused to herself.

Wolf Klaus huffed a breath, drawing back her attention, then turned to the outside with a slight shake of his head. Caroline could swear there was a hint of smile in his eyes, but he was gone in an instant, leaving a brush of wind in his wake.

Caroline snorted at his back unamused. He was such a show-off. She tentatively took a step forward, amazed at how quiet she was, the moist earth in the cave touching her paws softly. A surge of eagerness rushed through her and before she realized she sprinted out of the cave after Klaus like an arrow.

This was supposed to be a trapping curse but Caroline had never felt so free. Everything was fresh and vibrant, the wind combing through her furs swiftly, making a whistling sound in her ears like horns announcing the embarking of ships, boosting her adrenaline until she was high on clouds. She knew she was mixing metaphors in her head but she didn’t care. She was running on the ground, above the waters and in the sky, with each step feeling more and more powerful, fearless, invincible.

She caught sight of the dark grey wolf, now just a few feet ahead of her, and with a cheerful bark she sped up to pounce on him. They ended up on the ground with Caroline pinning him under her paws. She smugly bit his ear without much force, swinging her snout left and right slightly for effect. But Klaus quickly rolled them over with a grumble, now stepping on her chest for a change.

Caroline wasn’t about to go down without a fight. She threw him off of her with all her strength, and without a pause rushed towards him again, this time going for his throat. Klaus evaded her attack in a smooth move, bumping her in the side to throw her off balance. She bared her teeth, using the momentum to bite him in the leg, but Klaus saw through her intentions and pawed her in the face instead.

They sparred playfully for a while longer, until Klaus being stronger and more experienced, once again threw Caroline on her back and hovered over her triumphantly. The predatory look in his golden eyes shifted to something else, equally dangerous but more searing, his pupils dilated with desire. Slowly he lowered his head and licked her on the corner of her snout with his rough tongue.

Caroline couldn’t believe the soft whiny sound came from her own mouth.

Klaus huffed above her, the sound almost feeling like a laugh to her ears. With his hot breath in her neck she couldn’t help but lick him back, his unique scent sweet and arousing on her tongue. He closed his eyes and reveled in the sensation for a few moments before releasing her.

Caroline jumped up expectantly, eager to run and roam and chase something into the woods. But to her surprise Klaus stayed still beside her, not making a move. At her curious stare he turned his face slightly up to the sky, closing his eyes once again and sniffed. He looked so relaxed and contented, his left front paw scratching the ground in excitement. Caroline skeptically followed his lead, closing her eyes and sniffing.

And it hit her.

Innumerable scents floating in the wind flooded her heightened senses all at once. All the creatures in the woods, near and far, present and past, all their traces lingering in the wind like millions of signals waiting to be deciphered. There were as many of them as there were stars in the sky, and their smells, like the starlight, traveled through the infinity of time and space, reaching her with silent earnest, twinkling, burning, whispering.

And then there was him.

His warm, steady, comforting scent surrounding her, like the canvas of a night sky to the myriads of stars.

She opened her eyes to find him staring at her, seeming bewitched. She laughed inside-it was kind of weird that wolves couldn’t really laugh out-and inched closer to him. Klaus held still as if in a trance, or just in anticipation, and when their noses finally touched she sniffed _him_. The smell filled her senses, making everything else fade away except a heady bliss.

The unmistakable hint of smile returned to his eyes as Klaus sniffed back. It became almost like a game, where they mirrored each other’s action, no questions asked. If Caroline were still in her human form she’d no doubt start to giggle, but in this case she just nudged Klaus lightly and jumped a step away, her eyes challenging.

When she rushed out towards the falls she heard him following without missing a beat.

The wind became moister as she ran, her furs heavier, but her steps still lithe and swift. The way her bones and muscles collaborated in perfect synchronization made her want to cry out in pleasure. She felt she could run like this forever-as long as she could sense him with her without even a side glance.

When they neared the pool under the falls a strange scent captured her attention. Sweet and tempting. The scent of prey. Every fiber of her being livened up in excitement, silently buzzing for the chase. She slowed down to a halt, crouching down quietly in the shrubs, her body tense like a wound-up spring.

It was a herd of white-tailed deer, resting on the shore. Caroline looked sideways to see Klaus just a few inches behind, also in attacking position, nodding at her. He was letting her take the lead.

Caroline turned back facing the herd, taking a deep breath before shooting out of the shrub. A stag heard them almost immediately, jumping up in a frantic move and blew to the rest of the herd. The low warning sound sent the herd into action. One by one they galloped away to the far end of the shore, their white tails raising like a crowd of sails.

The sound of the stampede was foreign to Caroline. Sure she’d seen them on television, but the real life version of a herd of deer fleeing was completely another thing. Their hooves pounded on the ground like thunder, the vibration echoing on her fast-beating heart. She could almost taste their fear on her tongue, and it was such an addictive taste that she couldn’t help but craved more.

So she ran faster. Racing with the herd, with the wind, with herself. But she could still sense Klaus right behind her, every step on the way.

Eventually she spotted a young stag at the end of the thinning line, his antlers without much branching, clearly not strong enough to keep up with the herd. She took a few quick steps and jumped, landing half on top of his back. The stag soon lost his balance and stumbled, trying desperately to throw Caroline off but Klaus was flanking him on the other side, giving another strong push.

The stag fell to the ground and Caroline pinned him down hard, her snout at the side of his throat. He was still struggling and she could feel the blood rushing just under his skin, with each pulse the smell radiating off of him in waves. She reveled in the amazing feel for a minute, then abruptly jumped back.

Startled the stag stumbled up whimpering, then galloping off unsteadily.

She turned back and came face to face with Klaus. He seemed…teasing with his head slightly tilted to the side-that is if a wolf could actually look teasing. But this was Klaus. He could pull off pretty much anything, even in his wolf form.

Caroline could tell he was not even a bit surprised she let the stag go-she enjoyed the hunt enough. She didn’t need the kill, although it was in her nature to want it. But Caroline had never been one to just succumb to nature. She was wolf and she was human, and yet first and foremost she’d be _Caroline_.

She tilted her head to the side proudly, mirroring Klaus’ gesture, resuming their little game. But what Klaus did next took her aback. Something he rarely did as her beta. He drew back his right leg in a slow motion, and bowed to her.

All thoughts left Caroline’s mind. The only thing left in dominance was a primal urge, and this time Caroline complied. She raised her head to the moon, the dark curse they couldn’t shake, the beautiful pull they wouldn’t renounce. And for the first time in her life, she howled.

Once again right by her side, there was Klaus, howling with her in a code that only they had the key to.


	5. Chapter 5

_Sedona, 2016_

“Iced water? Really?” Klaus swishes the glass in his hand, the ice cubes clanking the walls making a brisk sound.

“No matter what you say, dude, I’m not serving you alcohol anymore.” Mason shrugs, “at this rate you’d be drunk before late afternoon,” he lowers his voice, “and we so don’t need a drunken wolf running around terrorizing this town. Plus you are driving.”

Klaus snorts at that, but takes a sip at the water nonetheless, “I’ll have you know my capacity for liquor is quite impressive. It’s a decent substitute for anesthesia.”

Discreet as they managed to keep, the pack still got into their fair share of battles during the years. It’s not always a wise choice to just pop into the local hospital with bloody clothes and massive wounds on your body. Fortunately for them, werewolves heal faster than normal human and their tolerance for pain is significantly higher. So when it comes to the inevitable, several nights of good sleep and plenty of alcohol would do the trick just fine.

“Do you guys fight a lot?” Mason asks a bit concerned, “I used to run with a pack for some time and it was really just living like recluses in deep mountains.”

Klaus shakes his head, “not particularly. But our pack is a fairly old one.” Sneering, he twirls the glass in his hand, “and generations of enemies don’t just vanish into thin air, do they? It doesn’t help that we are still growing and like it or not this kind of power draws attention.”

“What kind of enemies? Humans? Witches? Or those damned blood suckers?” Mason looks genuinely curious, “I’m pretty out of the loop. Almost spent my whole life here.”

Klaus huffs a laugh, “you know how humans are. They only see what they believe and nowadays they hardly believe anything. More often than not the ones we run into just think we are a bunch of crazy hippies on a spiritual trip or something. Works fine with us.”

Mason laughs out loud, “oh I can so imagine that happening.”

Klaus shrugs in humor and continues, “and witches aren’t so bad. They are sketchy for sure,” he should know-if he isn’t mistaken Ayanna is one, though she tried to hide it from him, “but they don’t care much about wolves. Usually we just go our separate ways.” He sets his glass on the counter, his face now grim, “it’s the vampires that are really annoying.”

“I never liked vampires.” Mason makes a disgusted face, “although to be fair I haven’t met that many. For a bunch of night creatures they blend in surprisingly well. But the ones I’ve encountered are not so pleasant to be with. Think they are superior or something. I mean, come on, you are dead. How superior can that be?”

“It’s not the attitude that repels me.” Klaus grins darkly, “with proper means anyone can drop their attitude, sooner or later.” He ignores Mason’s face that clearly says “you are being scary again”, going on with his speech, “but vampires are fickle. They can never be trusted.” He takes a sip of his water, chewing one of the ice chips with an ominous crunch.

“You look like you are speaking from experience.” Mason watches him closely, as if deep in thought.

Klaus ponders for a while. It was a long time ago, but whenever he thought about it a cold rage still crept into his chest. “There was this vampire from Mystic Falls, Damon Salvatore.” He spits the name out in disdain, “about fifty years ago our pack got into a fight with him. Turned out pretty bad for both sides. So eventually they agreed on a truce. Damon left town soon after-the humans were starting to get suspicious.”

“I’m guessing he didn’t abide by the agreement?”

Klaus sneers, “the minute he came back he decided to pick on our pack.”

He still remembered those first days when Damon appeared out of the blue. When they didn’t have any idea it was him. After one full moon they started to lose pack members. Every night there would be one of them going missing, and the next morning they’d find the corpse deserted in the woods, drained of blood. It was more like a sick game than a revenge, one they were dragged into blindfolded and defenseless.

The whole pack was shrouded in a fog of horror. Not knowing who would be the next, not knowing what they could do to stop it.

It was Caroline who found out about the identity of the murderer. Klaus hadn’t known that she had befriended one of the vampire hunting council (a lot of them weren’t aware of the council in the first place) in town but that connection got them the information they needed. Their old enemy from half a century ago came back and apparently had gone back on his own words.

“So what happened then?” Mason asks with a somber expression, probably sensing the direction this is going.

Wolves rarely hold grudges. They seek revenge on the spot, regardless of the price.

Klaus’ voice is devoid of emotions, “I bit him on the next full moon.”

“You? As in, alone?” Mason stares at him in shock, “and your _alpha_ was okay with that?”

Klaus raises one eyebrow, slightly surprised that Mason knows his alpha that well just from their fairly short conversation. But Caroline seems to leave that much of an impression on people. “She wouldn’t be Caroline if she’d just accepted.” He fingers the rim of his glass, a small smile curling up the corners of his lips like a tiny ripple in still water, quietly spelling out something hidden deep beneath, “but we found our own ways of working things out.”

They always did.

* * *

_Mystic Falls, 2010_

Klaus woke up with his body hurting all over. It wasn’t just the dull ache of bones stitching back together after a full moon, which he would recognize even in a state of stupor-it felt almost like a safe blanket to him these days, signaling the end of another round of torture. But this time there was something different, burning sensations on his arms, legs and chest.

And with that came the memories of last night. He mentally grinned recalling Damon’s face when he bit into his shoulder, cold fear snaking into his features ruining the ever-so-taunting façade. It was well worth the fierce battle he’d gone through and the few wounds he now bore.

At least he came out alive. Couldn’t say the same about his adversary.

He slowly opened his eyes, pushing the covering sheet aside to examine himself. There were some bruises and scratches on his limbs, probably from when Damon threw him into his furniture, nothing serious. The only worrisome wound was the big gash across his chest and the deep hole into his side at the end of it-the asshole had sliced him with his fire poker, damn him-but it was already closed.

“Welcome back to the land of the living.” A cold voice sounded quietly from his right side.

Only then did Klaus realize he wasn’t alone in the room. Turning to the direction of the voice he found Caroline standing at the window with her back to him.

“Nice job getting yourself all bruised and battered by the way. Very fatal-looking. Really earns you the sympathy points.” Her arms were crossed in front of her chest like they always did when she was angry, but her fingers curled around her torso tightly as if holding herself, her knuckles dead-white.

Klaus sighed, trying to sit up, but hissed at the stab of pain in his side.

“Stay right there. If you dare move a finger I swear I’ll wolfsbane you till you are literally putty in my hands.” She finally turned around to face him. Despite the hostile tone and the cold expression she just looked tired, her face pale and hair a mess. “After all that’s what you did to me.”

“Love, I’m really sorry but I did it for-” Klaus rushed to explain, but Caroline cut him off with a single look.

“I know why you did it.” She said quietly, her voice reminding Klaus of snow cliffs before an avalanche, silent and still like some vacuum space where sounds didn’t travel, with cataclysmal energies boiling just beneath the surface, “for my protection. For the safety of the pack. For the perfection of your plan. I get it.” she smirked humorlessly, “just like you knew I would shut your little plan to hell if I had a say in it. I would be worried sick for you. I would feel betrayed and untrusted and helpless.”

The dim greyish light casting from the window outlined her face, and for the first time in so long Klaus felt chilled to the bones. He expected shouting and finger-pointing and foot-stomping, which he all deserved, but not this icy rage and…bitter sadness.

“We do know each other well, don’t we?” Caroline huffed, pacing close to him, “but in spite of everything you knew, you still _chose_ to do it.” Her voice cracked a little, but she quickly recovered, not ready to forsake her mask just yet, “what were you thinking, Klaus? What were you thinking when you left me unconscious in transition and went on your suicide mission?”

Klaus stuttered a little, “well I…wouldn’t exactly call it suicide sweetheart. It was a full moon. I had a fairly big advantage on him.”

Caroline was now at the side of his bed. She looked down at him with fire in her eyes, her voice finally raising, “I found you at the side of the road, no more than half a mile from his house, bleeding like crazy and completely out of it.” She threw her hands into the air, “what if he followed you? What if some human caught you in your wolf form? What if no one found you?”

“I knew you’d come for me as soon as the wolfsbane wore off.” He never doubted it.

Caroline scoffed at him, “so _after_ your stupid martyr act you trusted me? Well too little and too late.” she turned to look outside the window, her hands balled into fists, “and plus, what if I didn’t get there in time? It’s going to snow. You could die from the loss of blood and cold weather. All while I waited to get rid of the wolfsbane that _you_ put in my system!”

Klaus felt his own frustration rising. Her anger provoked him, but her hidden fear and desperation agitated him more. He shot back defiantly, “a shot of wolfsbane is better than a hand ripping out your heart, love. If I had allowed you to come with me as you initially planned the one lying here or even dying could have been you!”

“ _Allowed_ me?” Caroline exclaimed, her brows almost shot into her hairline, “I’m sorry I don’t remember asking your permission to work with you as a team. I don’t need _your_ permission to fulfill my duty to the pack, to protect the people I love or to _be_ there when my jerk of a boyfriend is facing grave danger!”

“If it comes to your safety then damn right you don’t have my permission!” Klaus propped himself up with both arms, too livid to care about the stretching pain, “you are not _allowed_ to die, Caroline. Not under my watch.”

She inhaled deeply, her eyes flickering with blinding light like hot coals, “it’s all about you, isn’t it? You can take away my choices, undermine my strength, stab me in the fucking back all for the peace of your mind. Avoiding at all cost the faint little chance that you should be burdened with guilt. You are so afraid of losing the one person in this world that you just can’t lose.” She inched even closer, her eyes suddenly brimming with tears, “well guess what? So do I!”

“You are blowing this out of proportion, sweetheart.” Klaus restrained his anger at the sight of her watery eyes, a sharp pain piercing through his raging heart, “I’m alright, don’t you see?”

She pointed a shaking finger at his chest, “you call this alright? Imagine all…these,” she gestured at his injuries, “on me, and tell me it’s not a big deal.”

Klaus clenched his jaw, the image she just put in his head burning like acid. Even the thought of these wretched wounds marring her skin, of her suffering more than her monthly ordeal hurt him beyond repair. But he refused to back down from their confrontation, not when the root of which was to prevent her from ever landing in this kind of situation, “one of us had to do it. You know we couldn’t risk him discovering our ambush by bringing the pack.”

“And you conveniently ignored my suggestion that we go together.” Her lips were pressed into a thin line, a clear sign she wouldn’t just let him get away with it.

“It was too dangerous.” He closed his eyes briefly, somehow getting more aggravated at how the reason sounded feeble even in his own ears. But he had to draw the line somewhere.

As if reading his thoughts, Caroline shook her head in frustration, her nerves wearing thin with each second of argument, “how many times do I have to repeat that you don’t get to decide _for_ me? I have never pulled ranking with you before. I didn’t ask you to defer to me or to obey everything I said. All I need is for you to trust me and respect me, the same way I treat you. But if you are too conceited or just too thick to understand this then let me spell it out for you,” she bent down till they were face to face, her eyes blazing as she breathed each word, “I am your alpha!”

“And I am your beta!” Klaus exclaimed, his voice equally heated with so many emotions that he couldn’t begin to sort out, let alone explain. He uttered the words so naturally like they were supposed to justify everything, like this sole fact could put all their current disaccord into perspective and solve whatever it was that separated their bodies even after a whole night of terror and a near-death experience.

But maybe they did. Because in the stunned silence their lips found each other like two magnets, grinding and rubbing and kneading with invisible electric sparks blasting all over the place.

She bit his lower lip a little too harshly, but he just opened his mouth without a single grunt. He knew exactly what she needed-what they both needed. Her tongue thrust into his mouth aggressively, sweeping the inside like a storm before taking his own tongue, sucking hard till it ached, a question that didn’t require an answer. But Klaus gave it to her anyway-she could take his very essence with a mere touch. He licked her almost reverently, smoothing the hair that fell into her face, his move soft and gentle.

After several long seconds Caroline broke away first, but she didn’t open her eyes. Klaus cupped her cheeks and she sighed into his palms, her eyelashes trembling under his intense gaze.

“I _am_ sorry, sweetheart.” He kissed her eyelids delicately, “for what I put you through.” He couldn’t begin to imagine how she must have felt. If their roles were reversed he’d probably have gone out of his mind.

Caroline finally opened her eyes, peering at him with a bitter smile, “I’m so mad at you I could punch you if you are not already injured this badly. On second thought, I reserve the right to punch you when you get better.” She tilted her head a little to the side, leaning into his left palm, her eyes downcast, “but I know I can’t ask you to promise you won’t do this again, no matter how much I want to.”

Klaus sighed, stroking her cheekbones. They did know each other well. He wouldn’t be able to keep a promise like that.

Caroline looked up into his eyes, “so we’ll just have to do this another way.” The corners of her lips slowly came up forming a sly smirk, “and I believe after the stunt you pulled a little…punishment is in order.”

In a swift move she was out of his arms, towering over him with her hands on his shoulders, “now, do as you are told.” She pushed him back with little force but Klaus was more than willing to oblige. When he was again laying on his back she straightened up and ordered in an authoritative voice, “you don’t move any part of your body other than breathing and blinking, unless I _allow_ you to.”

Klaus felt his whole body heated up almost immediately at her words. He gave her a salacious look, “Hm, kinky. I didn’t know you had it in you, love. It’s quite a turn-on.” His voice became hoarse with expectation, “but I don’t think we have a safe word yet.”

Caroline’s finger was pressed on his lips the next second, “and I didn’t remember _allowing_ you to move your lips.” Her tone was light and her motions sensual, but her eyes were fixed on his, the commanding steely blues burning silently. Klaus knew she needed extra control after the night she’d had so he complied without another word. Caroline grinned in satisfaction, “good boy. As for the safe word,” she licked her lips and winked at him, “the only safe word I’ll accept is your hot come inside me.”

A low groan rolled from Klaus’ throat.

“Don’t get so worked up yet.” Caroline grinned, opening the top button of her blouse, “we are just starting.”

Oh the little minx. Klaus sighed in his mind as he watched her slowly opening her buttons one by one. His eyes were glued to the thin line of porcelain skin revealing from under the navy blue fabric. Noticing his stare, Caroline huffed a little laugh and brushed her fingers down her cleavage on purpose, “do you want to touch me? Do you wish it were you feeling me between my boobs?” She pushed the outfit off her shoulders, her beautiful breasts clad in black lace bra finally bouncing out.

Klaus swallowed hard. He longed to feel her skin and flesh, hot and soft under his palms, now more than ever. He knew she wouldn’t grant him the privilege, not today, but it only made him want it more avidly.

Caroline bent down to remove her boots before pulling down the zipper of her jeans, her eyes again locked with his, “now I’m going to show you my legs. I know you love my legs. I’m quite fond of them myself.” She pushed the jeans down, inch by fucking inch, and Klaus felt the fabric grazing on his own bare skin, the sensations speeding up his already quick pulse.

“And now this…I bet you want to do it yourself.” Caroline kicked her jeans away carelessly and bent her arms to her back, the posture making her ample breasts stand out even more, “but sorry, you just get to watch.” She unhooked her bra and threw it to the pile on the floor. Her breasts stood proudly in the cold light from the window, their curves so exquisite his chest hurt just from staring. He could see her nipples were hard and there were two thin red lines under her breasts from the wire of her bra.

Klaus couldn’t decide where he wanted to run his tongue over more. He heard himself panting, thirst for her body like a nomad in desert for water.

Caroline curled two fingers into each side of her matching black panties, her perfectly-shaped hip bones that he loved so much to stroke just behind her knuckles. “This is getting kind of boring, isn’t it?” She pouted as if in thought, “let’s have a change of view then.” She turned her back to him, her waist swaying a little in the process and Klaus just stared like hypnotized. As if dancing to an inaudible tune she shimmied out of her panties, and her bottom, round and perk, came into sight.

This was sheer torture. Klaus let out another groan as Caroline tapped her fingers slightly on her ass. “Remember, don’t move.” She turned back to face him, her face now flushed in a beautiful rosy hue. Klaus’ body was lit on fire as soon as he saw the view between her legs, that shiny streak of moisture below her dark blonde bushes.

Caroline noticed his reaction and looked down knowingly, touching the outline of her folds with a single finger, “look at that. I’m all wet.” She knelt onto the bed, offering her finger to his lips and answered his feverish look with a slight nod. Klaus immediately sucked her finger into his mouth, devouring it with craze. Caroline moaned at the feel of his tongue, but pulled out too soon for his liking.

“Do you miss my taste? Do you want to sink your tongue into my pussy and lick it good?” She turned to the side to tug at his tented up boxer brief, “god I want your tongue in my pussy so bad. It hurts just thinking about it.” She rubbed his cock idly through the fabric, eliciting a throaty grunt, “but I won’t let you help me with it.” She pulled the boxer all the way down his legs in an abrupt move and Klaus sighed at the relief before tensing up again as she straddled him.

Caroline bent down to reach something from the night stand, her nipples brushing his chest, making them both moan uncontrollably. She sat back up, holding a condom in her hand. “We both know I’m on pills,” she tore up the packaging, and drew out the next words breathily, “but I want you to last longer.” She put the condom on his rock-hard cock, pumping it a few times afterwards and Klaus had to hold his breath against the sensation to not come right on the spot.

Maybe the condom was a good idea.

With her eyes on his Caroline leaned forward, her lips just short of brushing his, their hot uneven breaths mingling, “now comes the hard question-pun intended,” her hand went down to grab his cock, “do you want to kiss me, or do you want to get inside me?” She grinned devilishly, “see? I gave you a choice.”

Klaus just stared at her, his eyes tracing her lips hungrily and for a moment Caroline seemed in a trance as she ground her pussy against his groin, a tiny purr of joy flowing through her lips. But soon she came to her senses and a blush spread from her cheeks to the upper half of her heaving chest, “clever.” She stroked Klaus’ jaw line, “you may answer. One word, former or latter?”

He breathed out his answer, making sure to graze his lips against hers, “both.”

As soon as the word left his mouth Caroline kissed him without warning. It was a primal kiss, every swipe of tongue screaming her need for him and Klaus reciprocated with all his desire. Her hands crept into his hair as she dived in further, gripping his curls with just the right amount of pressure and Klaus hummed into her mouth, his hands itching to come up and touch her.

As if sensing his agitation, Caroline pulled back with a smirk, “nice choice.” She licked her lips to savor the lingering taste and oh how Klaus longed to lick them for her. His cock jumped at the thought, making Caroline giggle, “eager much?” She held it firmly in her hand, “I should keep you waiting, only that I don’t think I can hold back any longer.”

She lifted her body up a bit to place his throbbing cock at her entrance, pressing the head half in only to let it slide sideways. The instant friction heated their bodies from where they touched and they both cried out as waves of need consumed them from head to toe. “Oops.” Caroline popped the word out through her heavy panting, the mischievous glint in her eyes soon drowned out by a searing lust.

Once again she put his cock beneath her pussy, this time sitting down on it slowly, sucking him in inch by inch. Klaus squinted at the warmth enveloping him. She was so tight he felt like he would explode from the pressure. When she finally took him all in Caroline threw her head back with a long moan, the line of her neck so smooth and inviting Klaus had to press his arms hard into the mattress to stop them from moving.

After she went past the overwhelming initial sensations Caroline turned her eyes back to Klaus’ face, studying him while leisurely playing with her own boobs, “you feel so big and hard inside me.” she hummed in pleasure as she circled her left nipple with her thumb and then pinched it, “I bet you want to move. You want to pound into me, hard and fast. You want to pull all the way out and thrust back in.”

Klaus’ head was swimming from the scenes she pictured, her words only fueling his desire, making it almost palpable like sweltering lava burning all through his veins, leaving him hot and hollow. “Can’t really do anything with the rules, can you?” he heard her saying, “luckily for me I know how to do it without moving a finger.” Her body held still as she clenched around him, her walls squeezing his cock making him cry out at the sudden assault.

Caroline herself looked equally flustered after the little trick, her breath short and erratic, and Klaus could feel her dripping along the inside of his thighs. She leaned forward again, her hands propped at either side of his neck and started to ride him, each rock of her body pushing his cock deep into her core. Every cell of his being filled with euphoria, but at the same time screamed for more as tides of need, each more drastic and intense than the last, inundated him.

For a minute all they could hear were each other’s groans and grunts as their sweat vaporized into the air, shrouding them in a steaming haze of pheromone. Caroline crushed her lips down to his, stealing a kiss before taking pity on him, “you can speak now.”

Klaus sighed as she pushed her neck to him, exposing her throat against his moving lips, “allow me to move, sweetheart. You know you want to.” He coaxed while sucking at her pulse point, enjoying the mewling sounds she made.

But Caroline shook her head stubbornly, pushing herself into him with a faster pace, her voice strangled and broken, “don’t forget…this is your punishment.” She leaned down and pressed her lips to the gash on his chest ever so gently despite her frantic movement, “you are to watch on the sideline, not able to do a thing.” A drop of sweat fell from her forehead to a smaller scratch above the wound, sending a prickling pain straight to his heart.

Klaus ran his eyes along her body, from her bouncing breasts to the adamant angle of her jaw line, from her glistening pussy to her blue eyes storming with want and rejection, “you are so beautiful, sweetheart. I want to hold your boobs in my hands and squeeze them hard. I want to suck on your nipple for so long you beg me to take care of the other one.” He watched as Caroline unwittingly started to follow his instructions, playing with her nipples with her eyes closed, “yes, right there. You feel so good, love.”

“I want to grab those pretty thighs of yours. I’m going to part them even wider than you already have, showing me all you’ve got. And then I’ll push into you so deep you’d feel me in your stomach and taste me on your tongue. I’m going to fuck you senseless until you forget everything and the only word left in your head is my name.”

“Klaus…” Caroline whimpered as she rocked on him with all her might, her pussy clenching around him tighter and tighter, the broken moans out of her throat almost painful. Klaus felt his cock tensing in response, his balls full and heavy for the impending release.

“God I’m so close.” Caroline all but sobbed out, her fingers going down to her clit, rubbing frantically, “I want your fingers on me, so bad. I need your hands to come.” She opened her eyes in desperation. They were a deep blue now like stormy seas, only the water was boiling hot signaling the eruption of a volcano on the seabed, “but you can’t move. I need you but you can only watch.” She bit her lips to keep the resolve in her wavering voice.

“Then imagine that’s my hand on you, sweetheart.” Klaus let all of his pent up desires bleed into his voice, touching her with his mind and heart, “imagine me rubbing your clit at the base, just the way you like it. Imagine me pressing down and grind the callous of my finger against it. Pinching it when my cock is the deepest inside you.” He felt the spasm of her walls and knew it was time.

“Come now, Caroline.”

Her body jerked with one last loud cry and she was shaking nonstop, her walls clenching hard on him. He came seconds later, growling as she kissed him through the unseeing bliss.

He felt her pulling out after a few minutes. She discarded the condom before lying down next to him, careful not to touch his wounds. He snaked an arm around her, running his hand along her back, feeling his skin just drink her presence in after the painful deprivation.

“I didn’t like it one bit more than you.” Caroline said quietly against his side, “bear that in mind the next time you decide to do something like this.”

He pressed a kiss to the crown of her head, his heart heavy and yet light all at the same time, “I promise.”

And this one he could keep. For as long as they lived.


	6. Chapter 6

_Sedona, 2016_

Caroline smiles at Mason who just came back with the order from another booth of customers. The scene feels so familiar it’s almost like no time has passed since five years ago and she’s still at the Mystic Grill with her sluttiest clothes on to convince the bartender she’s not underage. She can’t exactly say she misses that-she’s long since outgrown that part of her life.

It’s him that she’s missing.

The sudden pang on her heart has become usual to her. But unlike the pain of turning on every full moon, she suspects she’ll never get used to it.

Then she’ll just have to get him back.

Mason sighs from behind the counter, crossing his arms, “I really hate lunch hour. Everyone’s in a rush _and_ they have bad moods. It’s worse than breakfast.”

Caroline laughs at that, looking outside. The sun is shining brightly painting everything gold in sight, the outlines of faraway mountains melting into the strong light like mirage. She can feel the invisible pull of the moon, the disquietude inside her body growing. “You are looking quite busy. I shouldn’t keep you.” She drains the rest of her coke in one gulp, ready to leave for the forest.

But Mason’s question stops her, “not to sound like a gossip, but…are you going to find him?” He scratches the back of his head, looking sheepish, “from what you told me you guys seem perfect for each other.”

“Oh Mason, no offense, but you _are_ a gossip.” Caroline gives him a pointed look, giggling, “no one in their right mind would listen to me drone this long about my love life.” Her expression turns serious, “but to answer your question-yes, I’m gonna find him. Otherwise I wouldn’t have come back. There are only so many wolf packs in the States.”

“How did you decide to come back anyway?” Mason furrows his brows slightly, “I mean, five years, having seen the world? I bet there were tons of guys hitting on you.” He juts his chin out towards the other side of the diner, “by the way, tall dude by the window? Totally into you. Told me he’d tip me extra if I get him your number.”

Caroline shakes her head amused, “so that’s why you don’t want me to leave?”

“Why? You’d play along?” Mason smirks.

“We’ll see.” She gives him a mysterious grin, before returning to their previous subject, “I guess in a way I always knew I’d come back. I didn’t know when or how that would happen, but I was sure the day would come in its own time.” She opens her hands in a revealing gesture, “and voila, here I am.”

“So what one day you got up and just got the idea to come home?” Mason seems puzzled, “like an epiphany? Damn your life’s like a freaking TV show.”

Caroline huffs a laugh, her eyes pensive in recollection, “yeah, something like that. But actually I was in this little bistro in Stockholm for breakfast.”

She’d always imagined how it would go down. Picturing the possible scenes in her mind where she finally got the signals from the universe and her heart just _knew_ it was time. She thought it would be some place isolated with gloomy weather, like the deserted Irish seashores, where she’d stand by herself in the overwhelming wind, drowning in loneliness.

Or it could be some place really sunny and crowded, like Spain or Italy. Everyone would sing and dance and laugh in the street, cheery and boisterous with a lot of sunshine, and she’d feel miserable all of a sudden, finding herself out of place and crippled with memories.

But she never expected it would be so normal.

She was in Stockholm. There was just the proper amount of people and the weather was okay. Sunny, but not overly so. She ordered coffee and the waiter apologized in fluent English that their inventory guy made some kind of mistake so they were out of coffee, and suggested the fresh orange juice instead. She liked her OJ just fine so she gladly agreed. Everything was textbook ordinary. Not a story to tell.

And then it hit her.

Her life was good. Her life was wonderful. She didn’t _need_ him at all to have a happy life.

But she _want_ him so bad in that second her heart was breaking into tiny pieces, scattering into the clean and healthy air.

She ended up crying hard in front of the whole bistro, unable to utter a word between her heavy sobs. The manager rushed to the Starbucks down the street to get her a coffee but she still couldn’t stop her tears.

She realized then that Klaus would never be one of the necessary things in life. He was like the broken piece of paper she accidently grabbed in a carnival with half a poem scribbled on it, or the song she’d overheard a newly-engaged couple scream at the top of their lungs over the pouring rain, or the somersault she happened to see a little girl in a red dress perform in the middle of a huge square. No amount of world-traveling and sight-seeing could replace the unexpected presence of him in her being.

He was the ineffable anticipation she woke up to every morning, the unpredictable conversation she didn’t notice she was having with her mind, the never-ending contemplation on all that piqued her interest. The known and the unknown wrapped up in one.

He made a dark day normal, a normal day shine, and a shiny day unforgettable.

“The important thing is,” Caroline smiles, her eyes full of renewed conviction, “I didn’t want to waste another second being without him after that day.” She foraged for something in her purse, “which is why…” she holds that something out to Mason, “I’m gonna ask you for a favor. Would you keep this with you? In case he ever comes here. Tell him I’m heading to Tennessee and I’m looking for him.”

Mason nods taking it from her, “no problem. You guys changed your numbers or something?”

Caroline bites her lower lip, “we had an…understanding. And speaking of numbers,” She digs out a pen and piece of paper from her purse, jotting down a line before handing it to Mason, “here. It’s the least I can do.”

Mason looks at the number on the paper, smirking knowingly, “it’s fake, isn’t it?”

Caroline stands up and intentionally winks at the guy sitting by the window, “a girl doesn’t lie and tell.” With that she disappears through the wooden door, leaving the ringing of bells in her wake.

* * *

_Mystic Falls, 2011_

Caroline smiled at the scene she walked into. Klaus was crouched in a little wooden chair, his long legs curled up awkwardly in front of him with a story book poised on his knees. Across from him was little Sammie, hands cupping her own cheeks, brows furrowed in thought. The late afternoon sun leaked through the thick leaves above, splattering golden speckles all over their bodies, the pattern shifting subtly in the breeze.

She never tired of watching him interacting with Jenna’s little girl. He’d become good friends with Jenna shortly after the John incident and since Jenna gave birth to Sammie several years ago, the little girl kind of grew on him. Like her mother Sammie was smart and strong-willed even at such a young age and Klaus, being the ultimate magnet to the female kind (and maybe a large percentage of the male kind as well, though he never admitted it), had been Sammie’s steadfast target ever since she started walking on wobbly legs.

“She’ll make a damn good predator.” Klaus once complained to her dramatically, “she observes and waits for the right moment to approach. She’s stealthy and quiet with her ambush and when she gets her claws on you, it’s always on a tender spot. Impossible to shake off.”

And just as she told him at the time, he was all tender spots when it came to Sammie. Don’t get her wrong, he still got super awkward and rigid like he didn’t know how to act generally and lost all control of his facial expression, but the instincts that he didn’t believe he had always kicked in at the right time and made Sammie love him more.

Which was probably why he ended up being the designated story-teller once again. Another point for Sammie the Klaus Kryptonite (Klausonite?).

“Is the woods really that dangerous?” Sammie was still processing the story she just heard, “with witches and candy houses? But the candy house is not dangerous. The witch is. She likes to eat kids.”

“Well…it can be.” Klaus drew out his words, not sure how deep and realistic his answer could go, “but we don’t have witches here, none that we know of at least. And witches don’t usually eat anyone. Some of them sacrifice…hurt people for their own needs though.” He grimaced, as if already regretting having this conversation at all.

“So they are bad people?”

“It’s…complicated.” Klaus furrowed his own brows, his expression now similar to Sammie’s, “I think we all have some bad in us. I could be a bad person although you don’t know it. You could be too even if you don’t want to be. But we try our best to do right by those we care for. It doesn’t always matter but we still have to try.”

Caroline’s heart melted at his words. Sammie may not be aware of it, but she knew exactly how much weight those few lines held. She could sense Klaus tensing up as soon as the words left his mouth involuntarily, ready to bolt at any second. But Sammie always managed to throw them off with her little mind.

“I don’t think I want to go into the woods.” She jumped to the previous topic as if she hadn’t heard a word Klaus just said, and the confounded look on Klaus’ face made Caroline bite back a laugh, “I might get lost. Hansel left bread crumbs but the birds ate them.” She looked up at the sky, pouting, “we have a lot of birds.”

Klaus huffed a laugh, his face lightening up, “well you can always use the white pebbles.”

“Right! White pebbles!” Sammie clapped her hands while beaming at Klaus, “you are so clever!” She suddenly jumped up, taking the story book from Klaus’ lap, “I collected some when we went to the falls. I’ll go ask mommy to find them for me.” And she ran off to her house like a whirlwind.

Klaus stood up, staring at Sammie’s back wide-eyed before he shook his head and laughed. “Brat.” He muttered, clasping his hands behind him, “I was talking to you, Miss Eavesdropping.”

Caroline strolled to him, snaking her arms around his waist, “well in my defense, I knew you were aware the second I arrived and you just chose not to acknowledge me, so technically I wasn’t eavesdropping.” She reached her lips up to give him a peck on his dimple, “and hello to you too, Mr. Nothing-Escapes-My-Perfect-Senses.”

Klaus snorts, his arms sneaking up her back to hold her close, “you’ve outdone yourself, love. That name’s even weirder than my original one.” His face turned serious, “but first things first. I chatted up that vampire as we planned.”

Caroline tensed up imperceptibly, but she urged herself to relax and appear normal, “yeah? What’s her deal?”

They got the intel several days ago that a new vampire was in town recently, and a pretty old one at that. As far as they knew she wasn’t related to anyone residing here. Given Mystic Falls’ history with supernatural beings they decided to stay alert in case she had any ulterior motives. Hence Klaus’ task of espionage.

“Her name is Tatia Petrova. She didn’t reveal her age but I’m guessing a few centuries and up. You can feel the power just standing near her.” Klaus’ brows knitted together, recalling their encounter, “she said she was born here and had come back out of sheer nostalgia.”

“And what do you think?” Caroline squinted, her suspicion instantly growing.

Klaus shook his head, “I think she’s after something. But from what I gathered whatever she wants is of no concern to us. Vampire business perhaps.”

“Huh.” Caroline studied Klaus’ face. He was probably the most perceptive of them all, not to mention his sharp instincts. So if he felt Tatia wasn’t a threat to them then there was not much to be alarmed about. “That’s good I guess.” Her voice was low and somewhat hollow. For a moment she felt almost disappointed, because as much as she loathed the constant battles and shenanigans they gave her an easy out.

Of what she still wasn’t completely sure.

Klaus was quick to catch up on her changing mood, “what’s wrong, sweetheart?”

She had spent the better part of her day wandering around trying to make up her mind, debating with herself whether or not to tell him, to no avail. Yet as she looked up into those blue eyes she knew she was damned. Caroline had never been a good liar, but she did play certain tricks with her words whenever the need arose.

Not to Klaus though. No twisting or omitting or even rephrasing. At first it was just her conscience but as time went by it became physically impossible to lie to his face. He was her wine and in his presence truth she uttered.

“We need to talk.” She mentally hit herself on the back of her head for blurting it out like that. She was trying to be honest, not tactless.

Klaus had a strange look on his face. He seemed half surprised and half confirmed. Like he was expecting her suggestion, but not quite. Nodding he released her from his hold, his eyes pensive and subdued, “yeah, I guess we do. Shall we, um…” he gestured towards the woods, “go somewhere quiet?”

She silently took his hand.

They stopped at a clearing deeper into the woods after about ten minutes’ walk. Klaus sat down under a large beech tree and patted the ground beside him, “we’d better sit down.” He laughed a little nervously, “I have a feeling this is going to be a long talk.”

Caroline complied, but carefully kept some distance between them. She couldn’t afford to have any physical contact with him right now, not when her mind was currently a jumbled mess of thoughts. His scent and heat was already distracting. She kept running draft versions of what she was gonna say in her mind, cutting herself off every time before she even broached the real subject. The prolonging silence only added to her agony, but Klaus saved her from the minor anxiety attack.

“I’ve been thinking about what you said last time.” He started, and at her confused look specifying, “about the future of the pack.”

Oh. _That_ was what he thought they were to talk about. Caroline didn’t know what to feel. She was fretting all the way down here about her almost-decision that it didn’t even enter her mind they had an unsettled argument.

They had been at it for weeks. The pack kept growing these years and it became more and more difficult and unrealistic to reside in the woods of a small town as Mystic Falls. Klaus had a proposition that they leave for the bigger forests and keep a somewhat nomadic life style, whereas Caroline insisted they stay where the pack was familiar with and slowly fit into the human society. They had yet to reach an agreement when Tatia came into the picture and they had to put their argument on hold.

“As I was saying,” Klaus’ voice dragged her attention back to the present, “I’ve given it some more thought and I think we should compromise. I’m aware that some members of the pack are unwilling to leave, and I see your point that some of us need the stability, especially the kids.”

He locked eyes with her, exhaling long and slow, “to be honest I’ve never humored the notion of interacting closely with human. I’d always feel like an outsider, knowing we are essentially different.” He smiled a little, halting her attempt to interrupt, “I know what you want to say, but we both know I’m too set in my ways regarding my _trust issues_.” They shared a laugh, “however, I do believe the younger ones, like Sammie, should have the chance to make up their own minds about humans. And they can’t do that without getting involved.”

“You really think so?” Caroline was unsure. He seemed pretty adamant in their previous quarrels.

Klaus shrugged, “it all comes down to choices I guess. It _is_ the 21st century and I say we leave it to the pack members to decide for themselves. If they want to remain in the pack, we’ll figure out together where we are heading next. And if they want to stay, that’s fine. They can always rejoin us after a few years.”

“Choices, huh?” Caroline drew up her legs and rested her chin on her knees, “you are really okay with that? I mean I thought you’d be pretty upset if people just, you know, up and leave.” Her heart started pounding heavily in her chest, scared that he’d discover what she was intimating, the treacherous secret fidgeting restlessly under her indifferent mask.

Klaus sighed, averting his eyes, dark shadows flitting through his features making him look hard but vulnerable, the dichotomy that he always had been, “you know I value pack above almost anything. But even though we are a pack, we can’t always want the same things at the same time. Life is capricious like that.”

A sudden wave of irresistible sadness washed through her, so fierce and violent that she couldn’t breathe. Her heart felt like it was marinating in salt and acid and a thousand unprocessed emotions, raw and quivering, with tears bleeding out from all the hidden compartments and she just wasn’t able to hold it in. They rushed to her eyes and streamed down her cheeks like fleeing crowd in a silent movie, desperate without a sound.

The hitched breaths finally gave her away and Klaus’ hands were on her face instantly, trying to make her look at him, “Caroline, sweetheart what is it?” He sounded worried and frantic, which did nothing to slow down her tears, “you are really scaring me.”

She bit the inside of her mouth hard, willing herself to calm down and not act like a neurotic crazy bitch. She wanted to be composed and sensible at it-at least not like she was throwing a tantrum or having an emotional melt-down but all she managed to do was rasping out while wiping her face, “I have to leave.”

Klaus froze on the spot. After a few moments he asked puzzled, “where for?” His eyes blinking rapidly as though he couldn’t comprehend what she just said.

“No, not have to. I don’t have to, but I want to. Or a part of me wants to. I don’t know.” Caroline knew she was rambling nonsense and she hadn’t answered his question yet. She couldn’t hold this any longer, not under his almost helpless stare. She closed her eyes briefly and took in a deep breath, “Klaus, I’ve decided to…break from the pack for a while. I want to go around a bit, maybe see the world. Alone.” The last word tasted like sandpaper on her tongue and Caroline welcomed the dull pain-it kept her sane somehow.

Plus it had nothing on the look Klaus was giving her. His eyes seemed shattered upon hearing her words and the million pieces were put back together out of wretched pride. Seeping through the seams was something so cold and hurtful that merely holding his gaze sent her heart screaming in anguish. But she didn’t break their eye contact, not for a second.

“So you _want_ to leave?” Klaus bit out the words, his face blank like the center of a storm.

Caroline gave him a slight nod, “yes. I want to go out there and just…explore. Maybe try to build a life for myself.” She knew that would hurt him, she saw the explosion coming, but his sudden rage still startled her.

Klaus was up standing in a blink, his nostrils flaring as he yelled in a booming voice, “you have a life here!” He threw his tightly-clenched fist out in abandon and hit the trunk in the process, leaves falling from the shaking branches forming a heavy curtain between them, and his face looked obscure and distant through the transitory veil. In fact, Caroline hadn’t felt so far away from him since the first day they met.

“Yes, and I love it so very much.” Caroline tried to explain, to him as much as to herself, “but Klaus, all of my life I’ve been the alpha. I’ve never been anywhere, I’ve hardly done anything just for me without considering the benefit of the pack, I’ve never…lived.” She looked into his eyes eager for him to understand, “I want to become this smart, mature and worldly person and for that, I need some time away from this.”

“You mean me.” Klaus’ lips twitched into a lopsided grin but his eyes were humorless, “you want some time away from me.” He cut her off before she had a chance to protest, “and don’t try to deny it. I heard the word ‘alone’ loud and clear. I’ve got to hand it to you, love. You can be very brutal with your honesty when you _want_ to.”

Caroline ignored the flush in her cheeks, a tell-tale sign of another fresh bout of tears, “I do want to do this by myself. But you know very well I don’t mean it like that. You know that I don’t ever want to lose you, or hurt you.”

“Do I?” He always did know how to cut people the deepest with his words. Something he’d been sparing her from until now.

“If you have to nullify everything we’ve been through and degrade it by pretending our feelings for each other weren’t fucking clear then I have nothing to say to you.” Caroline herself was on the brink of losing it, “you have every right to be upset about my decision but if for one second you are questioning my reasons behind it, Klaus, you are out of your mind!”

Her head was still reeling when she heard his voice, this time without much hostility, just tired and hesitant, “is this about Tatia?” Her head snapped up in shock, the look on her face seemingly all the answer he needed. Klaus leaned back on the tree trunk with a defeated hint of smile, “I knew you were there the minute you stepped foot in the bar.”

Caroline sighed, shaking her head, “should have known. You really do have perfect senses.” She’d gone into town to run some trivial errands and decided to check up on him. She listened in on his conversation with Tatia but it was just for a few minutes. She didn’t think he’d notice.

“Just for you.” The sadness in his tone ate at Caroline’s heart, “I never thought we’d stoop to this but well…desperate times.” He snorted in cold sarcasm but his own wording betrayed him. He covered it quick, explaining what he meant by that, his expression shutting down further, “there was nothing between me and that vampire. I flirted with her because I wanted the information. Do I find her attractive? Yes, to an extent. Do I fancy her? Not one bit. She was just a means to an end.”

Caroline watched his stony profile, her heart filled with bitter sorrow. He was never one to justify his own actions and she knew how much it was costing him to say these. “I admit my decision had something to do with what I saw, or rather heard.” She reached up to tug at his hand, “but it’s nothing like that.” She tugged at him again and he reluctantly sat back down next to her, snatching his hand away.

Caroline sighed, “I wish it were just petty jealousy, however bad it may have looked on me. Unfortunately it’s not that simple.” She’d been intimidated at first. Tatia was extraordinarily beautiful with her long wavy dark hair and smoking body. Half of the bar was staring at her. But it wasn’t just that. She was charismatic in an almost old-fashioned way, sophisticated and well-informed. Even her modest burgundy dress looked classy enough to make into the wardrobe of a royalty.

But one look at Klaus and her nagging worry was gone. He may be laughing at Tatia’s jokes but his eyes screamed _bored_. Yet as she kept on watching Tatia still intrigued her, on a whole different level. The way she carried herself, experiences she talked about, her insight on things…it roused a longing deep within her, one that scared her to the bones because she knew she wouldn’t be able to resist.

“I’ve always had a feeling ever since we started to talk about the future, that this…small town life isn’t enough for me.” She was living the exact same life as her parents, her grandparents, and generations of ancestors before them. She dwelt on the land they dwelt, roamed the woods they roamed, and led the posterity of the pack they led. Sometimes she could feel their ghosts around her, in her, and the huge weight was dragging her down. “I was only pushing for us to stay because I was afraid I wouldn’t be satisfied with just repeating it somewhere else.”

She rested her hand on Klaus’ knee and this time he didn’t shrug her away, “and then I heard you talking to her about Budapest.”

He turned to her with furrowed brows, surprised and confused, “what does that have to do with anything?”

“You made it sound so beautiful.”

She couldn’t chase the look on his face away from her mind. How his eyes lit up when he regaled Tatia with his childhood adventure. How his smile seemed almost giddy while recalling sneaking out of his pack into the city. How his hands made excited gestures and his voice filled with awe as he described the parliament building at night, “it was all lit up, gold and shining, nearly transparent as if it were built from glass. Like a palace that you only see from Disney movies. And there were these gulls from the river, hundreds of them, just hovering above, also lit up by the light. When you look from a distance they seemed like stars with wings.”

His conversations with Tatia may have been a ruse, but his words and feelings were real. And Caroline felt infected, charmed even, by the pictures he painted so vividly in a dimly-lit run-down small town bar. She never wished stronger than that moment that she had it in her. That she had the wonders of the world stored in her to be sure there was no place she’d rather be than the here and now.

“And I just knew I wanted to see it for myself.” She squeezed Klaus’ hand at his anxious look, “I’m sure you’d take me anywhere in a heartbeat, but I have to do this on my own.” She smiled a little at him, her eyes brimming with tears at the sudden sense of finality in the pit of her stomach, “you once told me that every stream led to the ocean. I want to head for the ocean now.”

Klaus looked away from her, leaning his head back on the trunk facing up, blinking furiously. When he finally turned back to her his eyes were red-rimmed, but his lips were bent into such a sweet curl it broke Caroline’s heart on sight, “you only remembered half of my words, sweetheart. I said you were a stream.” He wiped away the stray tear at the corner of her eye, “and you will _be_ an ocean.”

He cupped her face and kissed her ever so gently. It tasted like the woods and sea water, and Caroline instantly knew she would taste it so many more times in the years to come, whenever she was missing him from thousands of miles away.

They stayed in each other’s arms long after the kiss, just soaking in the warmth they knew would soon vanish. Eventually it was Klaus who broke the silence, “since you are going to be a fish back into the sea, so to speak,” he chuckled as Caroline slapped his chest half-heartedly, “I want you to grant me three wishes, love.”

“I shouldn’t have let you read all those stories to Sammie.” Caroline snorted, knowing he was just trying to lighten up the mood, “you sound like such a dork. But ask away.”

His voice turned serious, “okay. First I wish you would stay until after the full moon. I want to turn with you for the last time.”

“It’s not the last time!” Caroline corrected him vehemently, “I’ll come back eventually.”

“Yes, you will.” He smoothed his hand through her hair, his tone almost reassuring, “the last time before we meet again then. Will you stay?”

“Of course. What’s the second?” She asked quietly, the talk about her impending departure weighing on her.

He hesitated for a minute, “I want you to change your phone number once you leave. I will do the same with mine.” Sensing her about to protest he silenced her with a peck on her hair, “as much as it pains me to say so, I agree that you need the time on your own to figure things out.” He choked out a bitter laugh, “and when you do, you’ll find me. One day.”

She didn’t know how to respond to that. She couldn’t see what the future held and it excited her, frustrated her, scared her, confused her. She was so sure this was something she must do but at the same time had no clue how to do it. She felt lost as if in a labyrinth and every turn could possibly take her further away from what she wanted all along.

But she couldn’t say it out loud. So she just asked numbly, “and your third wish?”

His breath was warm and soothing against her ear, “bring white pebbles with you.”

And with that, Caroline suddenly saw in her mind’s eye a thin white trail lit up by bright moonlight meandering into the labyrinth. She smiled, knowing without a doubt that no matter how deep she went and how many wrong paths she might take, she’d always find her way back.


	7. Chapter 7

**Epilogue**

 

_Sedona, 2016_

“Dude, I just don’t get it.” Mason is putting a stack of clean glasses onto the shelf, his head turned back to Klaus, “you two sound like the golden couple-in wolf terms anyway. Why did you let her go then? You know there’s always the off chance that she, well, won’t come back.”

“When did you trigger your curse?” Klaus smirks when Mason nearly drops the glasses at the sudden turn of subject.

“College, sophomore year, why?” Mason makes a face, “and that was the lamest deflection I’ve ever seen.”

“I wasn’t deflecting.” Klaus shrugs, “sophomore year you said? So you’ve been through the human route. Tell me, do you remember your girlfriend at the time?”

Mason furrows his brows, thinking hard, “barely. I was quite popular you know, and girls just…came and went. It was never really serious.”

Klaus nods before sighing, “exactly. Young love is all nice and sweet, but fragile. There’s always the doubt, the uncertainty, and people are easily swayed. It’s the best time to fall in love, and the worst to preserve it.”

“And you think that’s what it was about?” Mason raises an eyebrow, “I mean you and Caroline?”

Klaus shakes his head, his smile wistful but his eyes firm, “luckily for us, we are not like that at all.” There’s a smug tone to his voice, but it soon turns to nostalgia, “she was young, but she never doubted us. She just wasn’t so sure about herself, and…well, I could relate.”

He knew he couldn’t hold her back the second she brought up his speech about Budapest. He went there when he was only thirteen. His pack was just passing by, but he was going through a rebellious phase at the time and went rogue. He never regretted his decision, not even when he was yelled at and beaten on later because of it. As opposed to their cold words and vicious fists, he had the magnificent sight of an illuminated Danube River, palaces and bridges shining in the dark blue velvet sky.

It was his for no one to take, and it grounded him. In the light of the memory he saw himself, and his place in life.

Caroline may have been touched by the look on his face when he was talking about it, but she didn’t see hers. Her eyes yearned to hold all the beauty in the world. She had yet to see what life had to offer, and what she could become.

“She still needed the chance to grow. And to be honest, so did I.” Klaus grudgingly admits, “but unluckily for us, that was not something we could do together. Sometimes you have to be distant enough to gain the perspective.”

Or at least that’s what he reasoned with himself. What he told himself when he missed her so much he ached all over deep in the night. What he repeated to himself to keep the little sanity he had left. But the truth was he just wasn’t able to deny her anything. She said she wanted it, and she got it. It was that painfully simple.

“Yeah that sucks.” Mason sympathizes, “must have been hard. But look at the good side, you guys were dead serious with this. One way or another you’d end up together eventually.”

He sounds so sure about it himself Klaus has to laugh, “that’s very supportive of you mate, but there are a lot of…variables in this.” He traces a droplet of water on the wall of his glass, “and one can only hope.”

He often replayed the last night they were together. It was a full moon. Their wolves had got into a little game of hide-and-seek at Caroline’s silent suggestion. One of them would disappear into the dark woods and the other would run after. The chase was thrilling and somehow reassuring. Time and again they’d always found each other. After that night Caroline’s scent was seared into his mind like nothing else. Even to this day he swore he could recognize her in miles.

“Hypothetically speaking,” Mason now has a mysterious smile on his face, but Klaus brushes it off as plain curiosity and nosiness, “if you see her again, what would you do first?”

Klaus doesn’t even deign to answer. He just shoots him an incredulous are-you-crazy-or-just-that-dumb look.

“After _that_.” Mason deadpans, “or have you never thought beyond it?”

If he only knew.

He pictured it so many times in his mind he’s lost count. As much as he longs to hold her and kiss her and sink his hands into her blonde silky waves and make her scream out his name in ecstasy, he also misses her voice, her laugh, her company. Every time in his projection it’s something different, something trivial and mundane but with Caroline nothing is really trivial and mundane. Every second in her presence makes his heart sing.

He wants to draw her. She must look different now, older and wiser. He wants to run his pencil through the paper like he run his hands through her body, every line and curve and ridge and dip. He doesn’t want to miss even the tiniest bit of change, for her body now is almost like a map and each shift in contour has a story behind.

And he wants to hear her stories. Where she’s been, what she’s seen, who she’s met. Knowing Caroline she’ll have tons of photos and souvenirs ready to show him, to demonstrate her exciting discoveries nonstop with all those colorful details and witty commentaries. Or he just wants her melodious voice to flow through his ears, like he’s felt in so many dreams, but real this time.

He also wants to go drinking with her. She wasn’t even legal the last time she was with him. She was a light-weight and always turned to a handsy little cub when she had one too many to drink, but she said some of the most insightful things in her drunken state. He wonders if she’s still like that now, if she still keeps all those endearing habits and quirks of hers.

There are so many things he wants to do with her. So many things that are just figments of his imagination, and nothing more.

“I don’t know.” Klaus hears himself saying, his voice flat and void.

Mason smirks, his eyes glinting in a mischief that Klaus can’t quite decipher, “you might try turning with her first.”

“What?” Klaus is half puzzled and half annoyed at the weird comment until Mason reaches under the counter and retrieves something. Without a word he opens his palm, and what lies there sucks Klaus in like a black hole. He suddenly feels hard to breathe but he can’t for the life of him avert his eyes.

It’s a white pebble.

He’s up in a blink of an eye, propping himself over the counter, leaning into Mason’s face, “where did you get this?” His glare is murderous, his body shaking imperceptibly from rage but his voice is barely audible, uttered like the coldest death threat.

Mason just shrugs, “she was here, Caroline.” He smiles at Klaus’ involuntarily softening features, “just this morning. She left this with me and asked me to give it to you if you ever happen to step foot in here.” He wiggles his brows, handing the pebble towards Klaus, “it’s a small world, isn’t it?”

Klaus takes the pebble quietly. He doesn’t trust himself to speak right now, so he just runs his thumb over the smooth surface of the stone almost piously, as if it were some priceless talisman, or a magical existence that he never expected to see with his own eyes.

“She was heading to the forests, you know.” Mason gestures in the direction, “full moon.”

Klaus finally raises his head, the pebble now held firmly in his fist. “Thanks,” he told Mason, his voice low and calm, nothing like his tumultuous mind. All inexplicable thoughts and all unnameable emotions are swirling inside him, throwing him off balance. He’s left disoriented and unsettled like he was minutes from shifting, a pain mixed with deep-rooted longing washing over him.

In the middle of all the chaos he feels a pull, so strange but so familiar, stronger even than the moon, stronger even than his own demons and fear.

And he answers to it, in a heartbeat.


End file.
